Page 105 of Little Do You Know

Tears well up in my eyes, and I close them tightly to prevent them from falling as I press my cheek against his warm skin. “I’m sorry, Bash. I’m so sorry.” I didn’t know he was in the car when it happened. God, there’s so many things I didn’t know.

“Lia, there’s no reason to say you’re sorry. It’s a shitty card to be dealt, but I grew up raised by people that wanted me and loved me. The dreams are just confusing for me. I can’t make sense of what’s real and what’s fiction.”

He shifts to face me, causing me to disentangle myself from where I’m wrapped around him like a koala. I can’t help wanting to cry at the vulnerability Sebastian is letting me see.

“I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to make you cry.” He reaches up and gently brushes away a stray tear with his thumb. I hastily wipe the tears from my cheeks. I need to get it together because I’m trying to comfort him, not vice versa.

“No, it’s not that. I mean, it partially is, but I don’t know. I hope you know you’re not alone, and before you say anything, I know you think you are,” I ramble quietly, recalling the conversation with my mom. “My family is your family too.”

“It’s okay. I know they are, and I appreciate it.” Sebastian leans forward to press a kiss on my forehead. “We should go back to sleep. Even if I can’t do anything, I still have to show up to morning weights.”

He lies back down on his bed, and I curl into his side, resting my head on his chest. I wait until I can tell he’s asleep before closing my eyes again.

~

My head rests on Bash’s lap as he watches game film, jotting notes in a notebook. I look up at him, noticing his jaw has more scruff than usual because he didn’t shave this morning after weights.

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about our conversation last night. Sebastian was so vulnerable, showing me all his internal scars. I’m not going to do anything to make him regret telling me. Sebastian is the man I’ve always thought he was, and I’m glad we’re together.

“You’re staring at me,” Bash says without taking his eyes off the game.

“So? Am I not allowed to look at you?”

He pauses the game and looks down at me. “I clearly can’t tell you what to do; listening isn’t your best skill.”

I roll my eyes because that’s so not true. “I listen plenty.”

“No, you really don’t.”

“Shut up,” I say as he runs his fingers through my hair. “I listened at Thanksgiving, didn’t I?”

Bash lets out a short laugh, and I’m glad one of us can laugh about what a shitshow that day was. “I don’t know how you kept yourself in check. I expected the day would end with Vera sporting a black eye.”

“I can keep myself in check,” I try to defend myself even though we both know it’s not a strong suit of mine.

“Tell that to my face that was bruised after you hit me.”

I stick my tongue out at him. “First of all, you deserved it because you were being an asshole. Secondly, Penelope told me if I did ever hit you, I wasn’t allowed to hit your nose. I listened then and I went for your cheek instead.”

“Should I thank Penelope?” he questions, and I shake my head laughing.

“I don’t know if I’d be thanking her if I were you. She’s more violent than I am. Penelope suggested cutting your balls off, so if you want to thank someone, I would advise thanking your girlfriend, who thought that was a terrible idea.”

His face pales, and I continue laughing. This is priceless. Bash looks alarmed, and I cover my mouth to smother my laughter, but I can’t help it. I’m laughing so hard I have to force myself to breathe.

“She didn’t mean that, right?”

I sit up, still laughing, and fall off the couch. Sebastian is looking at me like I’ve lost it. And maybe I have. Who knows. I can’t remember the last time I laughed this hard.

Owen comes out crutchless to see what is happening, giving me a weird look. “Is she okay?” he asks Sebastian as I try to breathe, but it morphs into snorts.

“I’m not sure what’s going on with her. She thinks Penelope wanting to castrate me is funny.” Bash looks concerned as I wipe away some of the tears that have started to appear.

“Because it is funny!”

Owen shakes his head, grimacing at the thought. “God, you’re weird. I can’t believe we’re related.”

My side is cramping because of how long I’ve been laughing, and I press my hand on my stomach. “You’re the one who can’t walk past a mirror without checking yourself out,” I retort, and Bash snickers.

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