Page 64 of Avelina

She laughed. “Lina, it’s not as simple as yes or no. God is an idea born in the minds of humans, as is the idea of the spirit. Are they what people think? Not exactly, except in that the idea itself, which is a form of knowledge or awareness, exists. So, is there something? Sort of, but it’s not one thing, or at least not only one thing. It is at once whole and fragmented.”

I’m sure I was giving her a blank stare, but I had nothing else to offer to what she’d just said, so that’s what I went with. It was a valid choice.

“Look,” she continued. “It’s not like there’s a ghost manual or something, but from what I can tell, your spirit is the part of you that exists over time. It is the you that was, is, and will be. It’s like, a person can only die at a single point in time, but existence itself is not a single point in time. It isn’t a line or even three-dimensional or four-dimensional.”

Four-dimensional? You lost me.

Spirit rolled her eyes, then continued as if she hadn’t heard my thoughts. “Existence is infinite. Your spirit stretches into the past and future simultaneously because time isn’t linear as we experience it while alive. The spirit isn’t time-locked like the body. It is infinite in all directions, just like existence. In fact, from over here, it almost seems like time and existence are the same thing. Therefore, there is a part of you that exists now, but that part is connected to the part that stretches to infinity through time.

“That is what God is too. God is everything that is, has been, will be, could be, and couldn’t be. It is all things, all existence at every point in time and outside of it. At least, that’s what I think. Like I said, no manual.” She sniffed. “I could be wrong, of course.”

“Holy shit, Spirit,” I said. “You are blowing my mind as always. So unfair that you were both hotter and smarter than me.”

“Still am,” she said, winking at me.

I laughed. “True, but that’s not really much to brag about.” I turned back to examining the beaded bracelet.

“Not true,” she said. “I think, if I had made it a little further, you and I could have been something.”

I slipped the bracelet onto my wrist and turned my full attention to her.

“Me too,” I said.

She gave me another sad smile. “The twins were my second choice, you know,” she said. “I waited for you, but you had things to do with Drew, so I settled. Even after we left, I still hoped that you would knock on my door.”

“I wanted to, believe me,” I said. “I didn’t even invite her.”

“Freaking Marti,” Spirit said, and we both laughed.

“That totally sucks they were killed,” I said.

Spirit tilted her head, her brows drawn together. “The twins? No, they weren’t. They’re alive and well and—” Spirit stopped speaking abruptly, her face suddenly stricken. I heard someone squeaking up the ladder and turned.

“Lina?” Ward called out.

“I’m here. Come on up,” I said. “Hey, I found the rest of my toothbrush, but no toothpaste.” I turned back to Spirit, but she had vanished. That’s weird.

“Oh, my mother used to use dried mint leaves and salt,” Ward said, popping his head up. “She ground them up into a fine powder and mixed a little with water and had us rub it on our teeth. It’s not that bad unless you don’t grind it well enough.”

He crossed the attic and sat in the corner reading chair. He was so tall that he had to hunch over at the slope in the ceiling. I wondered if his thin frame would fill out now that he wasn’t stuck in a dog body. It looked like he had transformed back into the body he might have had as a teenager. He had those same beautiful amber eyes, and they roamed all over the room, probably searching for the ghost I’m sure he’d heard me talking to.

“Salt, huh?” I said. I was glad to see him. Now that I could actually talk to him, there was a little more awkwardness, but I still adored him. I opened a granola bar for myself and tossed him one.

“Thanks,” he said.

“Did Aaron spank you or what?”

“I wish,” Ward said.

I smiled hesitantly. “Yeah, he’s pretty, uh—”

“Pretty,” Ward finished.

“Yeah.”

“That’s an understatement,” Ward said. “I applaud your restraint.”

“My restraint? Is that a joke?”

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