Page 82 of Princes of Carnage

Tears spill down her face, her body trembling hard from the force of her sobs. She’s clearly overwhelmed by something, and whatever it is, it’s definitely nothing good.

All I can do right now is hold her, stroke her hair and rub her back, trying to be soothing with my actions. Whatever the issue is, she’s safe here. Anything that tries to come through that door to hurt her would be dead inside of thirty seconds, and I hope she knows that.

The sound of her hiccupping sobs echoes around us, and I just keep touching her, trying to ground her to what’s here and what’s real.

I lose track of time like that, focused on Quinn. Eventually, her sobs subsides, and I can feel her trying to match her breathing to mine. It takes her a few tries, her breath hitching and her body still dealing with the tremors from her panic, but after a while, she calms down, coming down from the worst of it.

Her body relaxes a little in my hold, and I lean back against the back of the tub, still cradling her to my chest.

After a few beats of silence, Quinn finally speaks again.

“I… that light.” Her voice cracks a bit, and she clears her throat, licking her lips before trying again. “That fucking red light. It brought back a bad memory. I guess it’s some kind of PTSD.”

She lets out a breath, shaking her head. I keep my hands on her, rubbing one palm up and down her arm. When she looks up at me with her beautiful gray eyes, I look right back, trying to convey with my facial expression that I’m listening to her. That I want her to keep talking.

She gets the message, letting out another messy breath.

“Back when my dad was still alive, still in charge of Enigma, I got… taken. By a rival gang. I was minding my own fucking business, heading home from being out with some friends, and they jumped me. I don’t remember how many there were, but it was—it was enough of them that I couldn’t fight them off. And I fucking tried.”

The corner of my mouth quirks up in a smile, even though I feel anything but pleased right now. I know Quinn would have fought back because she’s a fighter. She’s skilled and vicious, like Atlas always says. She wouldn’t have gone down without a fight.

I have an idea of what happened to her now, but I wait for her to say it, anger coiling in my gut.

“They dragged me into an alley nearby,” Quinn whispers. She turns her head to stare at the wall, her eyes unfocused. “And they…” Her throat bobs as she swallows. “They took turns with me, over and over again. There was this flashing streetlight outside the alley, and that’s all I could see while they kept me pinned down. Just that light flashing while they…”

A tremor wracks her lithe, muscled frame, and I hold her closer. It’s all I can offer right now, even though my hands itch with the need to rip apart everyone who ever hurt her.

“I never told my dad about it,” she admits, her voice dull. “I knew if I did, he’d go after them, and he couldn’t afford to do that. He was still working on carving out a solid place for Enigma, still building up the gang, and it would have put him in danger and risked everything he’d been building. So I sucked it up and pretended it never happened. I never told him anything. Not even up to the day he died.”

She lets out a shuddering breath as she gets to the end, and it feels like something has lifted from her shoulders with the way she slumps in the water after that.

“I shoved it away,” she admits after a brief silence. “And I keep shoving it away, because what the fuck am I supposed to do about it, right? It’s been years. It’s done. Over. But sometimes memories will pop up when I least expect them, and it makes me feel like I’m right back there. It makes me feel broken. Weak.”

I clench my jaw, breathing in her jasmine and honey scent as it mixes with the steam in the air. Even after months of stalking her, there’s still so much about this woman that I don’t know. I knew she was strong, a hell of a fighter, and a competent leader, but this is a strength I didn’t know she had. To bear so much pain all on her own, to keep her head up and to lead her gang the best she can, despite what happened to her.

I guess we have more in common than I ever knew.

Being this close to Quinn keeps revealing new facets to her, showing me things I had no idea about.

The idea that she thinks she’s weak for struggling with this doesn’t sit right with me though, and without thinking, I work to dispel that thought from her head.

“You’re not weak, siren,” I tell her. “I’ve watched you for months, and I know how strong you are.”

26

QUINN

Killian’s voice vibrates against my chest as he speaks to me for the first time since I’ve known him, and I go stiff in his arms, my eyes flying wide.

The words wash over me, but it’s not what he said that has me reeling. It’s not even the fact that Killian finally deigned to speak to me.

It’s the fact that I recognize that voice. That nickname.

How could I not?

I scramble up and out of the tub as shock shoots through me, sending water sloshing out onto the floor. Killian stands as well, his wet clothes clinging to his large frame as water drips off his body in little rivers, splashing back into the tub and all over the floor.

I’m suddenly very aware of how naked I am, even though I wasn’t particularly bothered by that before when he was holding me through my panic.

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