Page 13 of When I Had You

“Are there still presses, or is everything breaking online?”

“Sounds more dramatic with press. Like someone’s going to run in and wave their arms frantically to literally stop the presses.” She sits up again and empties the last of the red wine before setting her glass down. “Sometimes I wish there was a lack of immediacy to give time to process or dig deeper and time to breathe and realize you’re not where you’re supposed to be. But life moves fast, and I haven’t been willing to sacrifice to get off this merry-go-round.”

“I live for fast. It’s when I slow down that the problems creep in.”

She sets her napkin on her plate and pushes off the table to stand. “Guess we’re opposites that way.”

“Opposites have been known to attract.”

She hits me with a sideways glare. “You wish.”

I stand. “I wish for a lot of things. Sex isn’t something I have to wish for.”

“Whoa,” she says, jerking her head back. “That escalated quickly. We jumped from attraction straight to sex without a step between?”

“Isn’t that how it usually is?”

I’m given a solid eye roll before she laughs without an ounce of humor. “You’re not bad—”

“Thanks.” I straighten the sleeves of my jacket.

“Until you open your mouth.” She turns on her heel with her chin raised high and walks toward the door to join her parents.

I burst out laughing, but it’s a good reminder that I’d be wise to steer clear of anything to do with Marina. Too many red flags are attached to her last name and association with the team. Nothing good would come of us fucking around for a night, and a lot could go wrong in my career if we did.

Her father pats me on the back. “Thanks for joining us for dinner, Cash.”

“Thank you for the invitation and the meal.”

“That’s all Harbor,” he says, his eyes tracking over to his middle son. He sees his daughter and pulls her into a hug. “How’s my girl really doing?”

With her eyes finding me over his shoulder, she replies, “I’m good, Dad. I’m fine.”

“That’s good.” Turning toward me, he asks, “We’re staying at a house on the water. Do you mind seeing my daughter back to the hotel, Cash?”

“I don’t mind at all, sir.” Though I’m sure she won’t be happy about this arrangement, she doesn’t say anything.

We say our goodbyes and make an exit. Marina’s quiet, seeming to get caught in the moods of her thoughts, which I sense aren’t favoring me kindly after we slide into the back of the Town Car. Though I do catch her gazing at me before she turns away quickly, not uttering a word.

“Are you okay?”

“Actually, I’m not.”

And here I was, thinking she’d be pouting in silence over there. “Well,” I start, checking the time on my watch. “We have about ten minutes if we don’t hit much traffic. Since we’re here, air out your grievances.”

Her hand flips out. “I don’t need anyone to see me home or the hotel or anywhere else for that matter. I’m a grown woman, but I’m still viewed as a child.”

“I don’t think that’s what he meant—”

“I don’t need you to justify it for him. I love my dad. He did nothing wrong in his mind.” She sighs, dropping her hands to her lap and fidgeting with the seat belt.

“You didn’t ask my opinion, but since we’re here doing this dance, I don’t think anyone at that table sees you as incapable. Quite the opposite. I think they are more worried about the people you encounter. Ouch!” I joke, rubbing my arm where she lands a solid wallop on my bicep. Chuckling, I say, “Tell me I’m wrong.”

She tries to be serious but just can’t seem to get there, so she laughs instead. “You’re not wrong.” With a fading smile and a heavy released breath, she looks away from me. “I’m not sure where I belong anymore.”

I thought we’d be sitting in silence, letting her emotions move in and out with the tides regarding my company. I like this better. She’s not putting on a pretense or trying to appear happy for others. Next to me, she wears sadness like no other emotion fits. Though I can’t say I’m glad she’s sad around me. I wish it were the opposite. With me, she’s real.

And I’ll take real any damn day of the week. Sure beats the fake I’m usually served by people trying to infiltrate my inner circle for personal gain.

---