Page 56 of The Dragon's Mate Proposal

“If this”—she gestured back and forth between us—“is going to be something, if we’re going to make it work, then you need to learn to trust me. You need to let me in.”

I gritted my teeth. She was right, of course. She usually was. But that didn’t mean I liked it or was comfortable with it. The pain, the embarrassment … the shame.

“Hey, I told you about my past,” she said, her eyes searching my face. “About the failure of my marriage.”

“I know.” Was that all I could say?

“Do you think that didn’t hurt?” She flicked her hair back over her shoulder, the sun making it glow.

“I guess,” I said.

“It did. It’s embarrassing, to admit that. To say I failed. There’s a shame that comes with that sort of failure. Admitting you aren’t good enough to make that pact work. Yes, yes, I know there were two of us, and I wasn’t the only one, but still. I couldn’t make it work, and I had to give up. That burns, deep down. It never goes away, either.”

“No, it doesn’t,” I agreed.

“But one thing I’ve learned is that we make mistakes. We all do. We’re only hu—” She cut herself off short with a rueful smile. “Well, we’re all mortal. How about that?”

A corner of my mouth twitched.

“Mistakes happen, Cade.”

“That’s the problem,” I said, looking past her, into the distance. “It wasn’t a mistake. I did it on purpose.”

She patted my chest and shoulder, shaking her head. “I’m sure it’s not that bad, Cade. We tend to think the worst of ourselves.”

I looked at her sharply. “You don’t know the first thing about it. How can you say that?”

Her face softened. “Because, Cade, if there’s one thing I’ve learned about you, it’s that you’re a good person.”

The laugh that ripped from my chest was full of pain. “No, I’m not.”

She opened her mouth to say more, to try to comfort me, but I shook it off. It was clear the conversation wasn’t ending unless I told her the truth, so I would just get it out there, get it over with.

“I was an asshole,” I said bluntly. “I am an asshole.”

“No,” she whispered. “I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding.”

Another bark of hurtful laughter. “Stop trying to make me feel better! It is my fault, Samantha. Mine. I left them. Do you know why I did that? Why I abandoned my family? Because I told them they weren’t good enough for me.”

She sat back slightly, her eyes searching mine. “Why?” she asked at last.

I sighed. “Growing up, my family never had much in the way of actual money. We didn’t go without because that’s not how dragon society works. But we lived frugally. Within our means. And to me, that wasn’t enough. I wanted fortunes and the finer things in life. I told myself I deserved it. That I deserved more. So, I told them they weren’t good enough, and I left them. Because all I wanted was gold, and my family couldn’t give it to me. Not money, at least.”

Memories of everything else I’d had growing up flickered through me. Family and fun. Good times. A sense of community and belonging. All that had been present there. I hadn’t realized it until I came back. Now, I could only think about what I’d missed and what might have been.

It was a heavy weight to carry and one that bowed my shoulders.

“Cade …”

“No,” I said. “I don’t want your pity.”

I looked up at her, meeting her eyes and letting her see the true me. That should be enough to scare her, to make her realize she was making a mistake.

My dragon growled something about me being an idiot. I shoved it aside, uninterested in the thoughts of a beast.

“I told them I was going to go live a real life,” I whispered, reliving that last conversation. “That I was going to go get all the things they didn’t give me. And I did, Sam. Oh, I did. I made my fortune. Several fortunes. Then you humans took that away from me when you kidnapped Vicek and the war started. I lost everything. Everything except this place. A place I should never have left in the first place.”

Slipping from her grip, I got to my feet. She let me, not saying a word.

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