Page 100 of The Pact

I cock my head. A million meanings to her words fly through my mind. Her hand falls away, although not before grazing down my torso. “And what do you think I need?” I challenge. She must think I only want sex by the way she’s standing so close and touching me. I mean…I do, however, that’s not all I want.

Her stare drops. “I don’t fully understand why, but I know you need to be in control to feel safe.” The words startle me. That’s not what I was expecting. “You need me to trust in you. You need me to need you.” The words pummel me, yet she doesn’t stop. “I need you, Damian.” Her gaze lifts to mine as she says it. Her thick inky lashes darkening her deep blue eyes. “It’ll be hard for me, at first. I’m not used to it. But I can do that for you.”

I look away. “I don’t know what you’re playing at, but it isn’t cute.”

Thea’s face twists in anger. “I’m not playing at anything. I’m making an effort, for you, like you’ve done for me.”

I don’t believe her. Even if I wanted to, it’s a dangerous path that only has one outcome. It’s one I’ve forced myself to block out. I hate the warring of emotions inside of me. This is what I want from her—she’s nailed it. I should be happy. Still, the doubt is stronger, making me bite back at her. The doubt that she genuinely means it. The doubt that I’m worthy if she does. And the doubt that she’ll accept me for who I really am.

Thea sees what I show her. She sees that I crave control and providing for my family brings me happiness. But those are surface level things. If she knew me, who I truly am and what I’ve done, she wouldn’t care about me. She wouldn’t want to need me. Thea would probably run.

That’s always been my fear, though. Even with my brothers. That they’d see I’m not worth the trouble, despite everything I provide. That’s why I give them everything, isn’t it? So that I’m valuable in some way and they won’t leave.

Pushing out a harsh breath, I shake my head. “Princess, don’t worry about me. Focus on my brothers.”

She crosses her arms. Now we’re touching and I can’t stand it. That stubborn, bratty look on her face mixed with the hurt in her eyes is going to be my undoing. Thea bites her lip, probably holding back some kind of insult.

I watch as the expression on her face flattens into nothingness. “Fine. If that’s what you want.”

She turns and walks back towards the door. I don’t miss the slight glance back she gives me or her plump ass taunting me. My dick pushes against my pants. Nothing a shower and my hand can’t take care, I tell myself unconvincingly.

34

THEA

There’s a large bag on the desk in the waiting area as I walk into the studio. Cassie’s sitting in a chair in the corner. Her brown eyes flick up from her phone and she beams at me. My stomach knots. I’ve been debating all morning if I should tell her about Gavin.

We talked briefly last night after I had the chance to process everything with my apartment. I didn’t tell her then, only because I was already tired and didn’t want to be on the phone all night. Also, I had to deal with the text from my mom.

Mom: Have you heard from Gavin lately?

I about threw my phone across the room. Not a “Hi” or “How are you?”

Me: No..

It’s a lie, obviously, but considering this is the first I’ve heard from her in a month, I’m not exactly eager to share anything about what’s been going on. All she seems concerned about is Gavin, anyway. She never replied to my answer.

“What’s this?” I ask, pointing to the bag.

Cassie cants her head and grins. “Oh, one of your lover boys dropped that off a little while ago,” she teases. “Wesley.”

Curious, I peek inside. I pull out a big bowl with a clear lid. A salad. Further down in the bag, he’s packed me some snack bars, an apple, water, and some almonds. I can’t help the silly smile that spreads over my mouth.

I put the salad in the mini fridge and plop down next to Cassie.

We’ve only been apart for a week, however, after seeing each other nearly every day for the last few months, it feels like it’s been forever.

“I have so much to tell you,” she starts. I let her spill every detail of the last week. In the back of my mind, I’m still undecided about how much I should tell her. “…and then he introduced me to Johnny Mertz and Nicolette Herrera!” I immediately know that this is a big deal. These are photographers she’s admired for a long time.

I pull her in for a hug. It’s more for me than her. I’ve missed my best friend.

“I’m so happy for you. It sounds like this job was a dream come true.” I know the truth—Cole recommended her for it. Telling her is what I should do, but I can’t. She’s still riding the high from the event and I don’t want to chance ruining it. And I definitely don’t want her feeling like she owes Cole something. He did it out of the kindness of his heart.

When she finishes retelling her stories from the last week, she looks at me pointedly. “So…when are we moving you in? Did your landlord say how long until your apartment will be ready?”

This is the part I’m dreading. “He called yesterday. The damage is extensive. He’s terminating the lease.” Her brows knit in worry.

“What? Over water damage from his crappy pipes? That’s insane. I can talk to him.”

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