Page 73 of The Pact

“Hey.” He sits down next to me on the sofa. “You’ll make this work. I know you will. If this is your passion, then you need to stick it out.”

I know he’s right, however, sticking it out doesn’t pay the bills and I can’t rely on Damian to financially support me—that doesn’t feel right, even if he says it makes him happy.

“I don’t think I told you how I ended up owning this place.” He settles in and pulls my legs into his lap. “When I graduated, I came home, feeling like I was missing something. Damian, Wesley, and Cole had already made their way back and connecting again felt great, but I was directionless. I was living with my parents and didn’t have any idea on what I wanted to do next.” Sutton’s hands run over my bare legs, sending a shiver over me. “I saw the help needed sign in the window of this bookstore.”

“Wait… someone else owned this place before you?” He nods. “I don’t know why I assumed you bought or rented the location and built it up.”

“No,” he chuckles. The soft light from above hits the metal of his glasses. “That would’ve been too expensive. The man that owned this place before me couldn’t find an assistant who would stay longer than a few months. He made a promise that if I worked until he retired that he’d let me buy the place for a reasonable price. I didn’t believe him. It seemed far-fetched. He underestimated my love for books. The day he retired, he told me what he’d like to sell it for and told me he could have the papers drawn up if I felt like it was a fair deal.”

“Was it a fair deal?”

“Didn’t matter. I wanted it and I would have paid three times as much as I did. Well, not me. Damian.” I sit up straighter at the comment.

“Damian paid for this… for you?”

Sutton gives me an incredulous look, arching a brow. “That’s part of the pact. Damian’s an investor in our businesses. That’s why we share assets and finances. He helped Cole get his bakery. He invested in Wesley’s adventure guide business. And he helped me buy this place. As our businesses profit, we pay him back for his upfront investment. We all share in the profits after that.”

“I-I didn’t realize. Does Damian come from money?”

He scoffs. “No, not at all. That’s probably why he’s so successful. He had nothing growing up. He was at my house for dinner most nights so that he could have a hot meal before bed. Don’t tell him I told you that—he’ll kill me. He made his money after college, sold his first software program for a pretty penny, bought the land where the house is and built it with the hope we’d eventually all come back.”

His words strike something in my heart. It’s slowly clicking into place—who Damian is, why he is the way he is. While I’m sure there is so much more to his story, I can tell that his need to take care of others must be because he wasn’t taken care of. That afternoon in the kitchen when he read me like the back of his hand makes sense now. He saw right through me, saw how I was neglected because he saw a part of himself in me.

His fixation with me being a princess and taking care of me because it makes him happy leaves me wondering if he only feels worthy when he can provide for others. Does anyone take care of him the way he takes care of others? I’m curious to know what he needs to be happy, providing aside.

Sutton’s touch brings me out of my thoughts. This, I realize, is part of the balancing act. I can’t let myself dwell on one of the other men while I’m spending time with another. I smile sweetly at Sutton. “I’m so happy that this all worked out for you. You deserve it and I hope my dreams work out just as well as yours did.”

“They will, I have no doubt,” he says reassuringly. “Now why don’t you take a break from work and let me read to you a little.”

I put my laptop on the table and lean back, sipping my coffee while Sutton begins a story I’ve never heard—enjoying the sound of his soothing voice.

Sutton reads for a long time and although I’m not a huge reader, I love the story he’s picked. I even agree to take it with me to continue where we leave off.

It’s a quiet day at the bookstore—we haven’t been interrupted once. My thoughts wander as he skates his finger over my legs. He’s always been respectful, sometimes too respectful.

Damian mentioned Sutton talking about me after he graduated and moved back home. I was the one that got away, according to him. So why did he never tell me how he felt?

In the safety of this reading room, as I’m stretched out across him, I feel brave enough to ask.

“Why didn’t you ever make a move on me in college?” His movements pause momentarily. “Damian said something… I mean, I thought maybe you weren’t into me after two years of waiting.”

Sutton’s amber eyes slide over to me. “What did Damian say?”

I try to remember his exact words. “Something about not being able to get me out of your head and other things.” I look away, feeling shy all of the sudden.

His fingers leave my leg and I think he’s about to get up. Maybe that’s too sensitive a subject. Instead, he runs his hand over his head.

“I was such a fucking coward back then. I hate myself for it. Things could have been so different if I would have…” Studying him, I watch the regret play out on his face.

Taking his hand in mine, I echo those feelings. “I’ve felt the same thing over the years. I never stopped thinking about you. I wanted to call, but after I started dating Gavin… I knew that it would be selfish to bring you back into my life. So, I stayed away.”

A bittersweet smile pulls at his mouth as his gaze holds mine.

“And fate brought you back to me in the most unconventional way.” The air feels tense with the millions of things we want to say.

I want to reminisce about the nights I would pretend to fall asleep on his chest, just to listen to his heartbeat for hours. I want to tell him that there were moments over the last twelve years where I would stop in my tracks and suddenly think about him, wondering if he was thinking about me at the same time. Although more than anything, I want to act on all those missed chances from our past.

He must feel it too because he doesn’t let the moment slip by like he would have back then. Sutton’s leaning towards me, making my heart thunder in my chest. The pounding reaches my ears until it’s all I hear. His hand cups my neck, as he pulls me to him.

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