Page 24 of Protector

“It’s not like we could be together.” I shrug.

“Why not?”

“Because you’re you and I’m me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

I turn to look at him, and he stands there, arms dangling by his sides and a look of concern etched on his face.

“Look at us, Puck. You have a whole life ahead of you. You can go out, meet people, have new experiences, explore the world. I can’t do that. I’m stuck here, and this is all I will ever be.”

I realise how dramatic I sound, but it’s true. I’ll never be allowed to leave here, except in death, maybe.

“Bonnie, you’re not stuck. We can-”

But I cut him off, because whatever he says won’t change my reality.

“Yes, I am. No one knows I exist!”

I’m shouting now, and tears are pouring down my cheeks. It’s not Puck’s fault, but I know that no matter what happens, nothing can ever go beyond the grounds of this mansion. Daddy just simply wouldn’t allow it.

“They will, Bonnie. If we just give it time, we can-”

“I DON’T HAVE TIME!” I shout, throwing the clock against the wall and watching it shatter on the ground. “I don’t get time to meet people. I don’t get time to wander free. I don’t get time to grow old and have a family and see the world. All I have time for is you and King and Dax and these four walls.”

Puck steps toward me, crunching some of the plastic of the clock on his way.

“Bonnie, it doesn’t have to be like that. We can run away.”

I laugh bitterly. I might be sheltered and young, but I’m not that naïve. Running away isn’t that simple, it never is. There isn’t a life for me outside of here.

“We’re not Peter Pan and Wendy, Puck. There is no Neverland. There is no second star on the right.”

“We can make one.”

I drop to the floor, pulling my knees up and burying my head.

“Daddy would never allow it.”

I wonder what my daddy would do if I left. Would he chase me? Capture me and bring me back? Would he act like I never existed, which he does anyway, and just let me be free? If it were that easy, I’d have done it by now, right?

But even if he did let me go, I’d never stop looking over my shoulder, waiting to be dragged back to reality. My actual reality.

After a few seconds of brutal silence, Puck’s voice echoes around me.

“I don’t care what Carlo thinks. I don’t care what he allows. He doesn’t get to do this to you, Bonnie.”

“He can, and he will.”

“When you’re eighteen, then you can leave. He’ll have no right to keep you here.”

“Of course, he will. He’s my dad.”

Puck drops down next to me, cradling me in his arms like he’s done many times, used to my tears dampening his top.

“That man is no father to you, Bon. A father is supposed to love and care and protect their child, not do the complete opposite.”

And even though I know it’s true, it makes me sob louder. Because all I’ve ever wanted is the affection and love from him.

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