Page 17 of Protector

Pulling back the door timidly, I poke my head out and watch her eyes crinkle in worry at my tear-stained face.

She steps forwards, letting herself into the bathroom and closing the door behind her.

“What happened?” she asks, and I never knew until this moment how grateful I was to have Maria. She is the only woman figure I have in my life, and I appreciate her now more than ever.

“I, I started my period,” I hiccup, and she brushes my hair back out of my face.

She chuckles lightly as she wipes my tears from under my eyes.

“Why has that got you so upset? We’ve spoken about it before. We knew it would come eventually.”

My bottom lip quivers, and the thought of saying it out loud has me feeling sick to my stomach.

“It came through on my shorts and, and all the boys, they all saw.”

I let out another wail, and Maria gathers me in her arms, stroking a hand down my thick dark hair.

“Oh, Bonnie, it’s okay, I promise,” she shushes me, but I just shake my head, my tears soaking through her blue top.

“No, it’s not. They’re all going to laugh at me now. Puck had to tell me why they were all looking at me funny. Oh God, I want to die.”

“Now enough of that language, missy,” Maria scolds, pulling me away at an arm’s length and bending slightly so we’re eye to eye.

“Now, I know my boy, and I know King and Dax well enough. None of them are going to laugh at you. In fact, none of them are going to even bring it up. You’ll see.”

I sniff a little more and eventually nod when I know she isn’t going to let it go until I’ve accepted it.

“Let’s get you sorted. You know where the sanitary products are, just in that cupboard. Go and get a change of clothes and have a shower, and I’ll be waiting in your room if you need me, okay?”

I nod again and do as she says.

Maria has always been like a mother figure to me. She’s been that person I can rely on always, in ways the boys can’t. Like today.

If only I knew at this moment, just how important a role she’d take in my life in a couple of years.

Later that evening, I’m in my bed, watching Peter Pan, of course, when a knock sounds at the door. I shout a hello and my face heats when I see Puck slowly step inside, with King and Dax behind him.

But without a single word, Puck plops himself down beside me, lifting me up slightly so that I fall back onto him. King and Dax make themselves comfortable on the other side of me and at the end of the bed.

King throws a big bag of crisps in my direction before turning his head back to the screen, and I don’t miss the eyeroll when he sees what's on the TV.

I look up at Puck, and with a wink and a small smile, we all sit cramped on my little single bed, watching Peter Pan like nothing had happened.

Shaking the awkward memory from my head, I think about my other changes. Like my breasts, for instance. A small handful each, making it no longer possible to go without a bra if I don't want to draw attention to myself.

I’ve started to love who I’m becoming, and that isn’t because of what I look like, but how I’m made to feel.

Puck can never take his eyes off me.

Something has changed this last year, and I know, I know, I’m obsessed with him, so I could just be overthinking it, but I’m not. He’s seen me. Like, really seen me.

His eyes linger on my lips for a few seconds after I talk, or they trail down my body when he thinks I don’t notice.

He’s stopped sleeping in my room, and as much as it hurts to wake up and he’s gone, I feel like it’s only him being respectful. After all, I am getting older, and if I were in the real world, boys would notice me. At least, the way King and Dax talk about girls, and the way the guys in my books think about girls, I feel like I’m starting to fit into those categories.

I’ve abandoned my childhood fairy tales for exciting romance novels. Maria borrows more and more books from the library for me, about romance and lust and complicated feelings.

I know how I feel means something, as it’s how all the characters feel when they’re in love.

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