Page 43 of Lie For Me

‘Why do you have to keep pushing?’ he snapped. ‘I’ve said I don’t want to talk about it.’

‘Okay, okay. I’m sorry.’

His sharp tone surprised her. Jack usually handled everything with good humour, no matter how delicate the situation. She made a zipping and locking gesture at her lips and threw an imaginary key into the lake.

Lucy resolved to keep quiet and concentrate on minding her own business. Her kayak bobbed gently in the water, and she tried to reconnect with the relaxed feeling she had had when they’d first come onto the lake. Before she asked too many questions.

Lucy studied the inside of her eyelids and wondered at what age she would learn to stop badgering people. She shifted inside the kayak and could feel sweat gathering under her life vest. She shuffled herself into an awkward semi-prone position and tilted her head back to the sun.

The water, disturbed by a group of passing paddle boarders, slapped at the side of the boats, and Lucy and Jack trailed their fingers in the water and splashed cold water over their faces to cool down. A father teaching two boys how to paddle passed by in a large shared kayak.

‘On my count,’ he said, as the boys, overexcited, dipped their oars in and pulled and sent the kayak in a circle. ‘I said on my count!’ he shouted.

Lucy giggled and sank her chin into her life vest to smother it.

Suddenly, Jack broke the silence.

13

‘You know my mum and dad didn’t have a happy marriage and split up when I was young,’ Jack said.

Lucy propped herself up on her elbows and nodded. She knew this part, even though Jack didn’t like to talk about it much. ‘Yes. You told me your mum met someone else, that your mum and dad didn’t even speak to each other after the split, and you don’t speak to your mum now either. You said she moved away.’

Lucy followed Jack’s gaze to a young family playing at the water’s edge. The dad was holding a toddler’s hands in the air as she took her first steps into the water and chortled in delight. The mother was deeper in the water, encouraging a young boy in armbands to swim toward her.

Yes’, Jack swallowed. ‘But there’s a bit more to it.’ He glanced back at the shore.

‘She left us because she had been having an affair with another man,’ he hesitated, ‘and was pregnant. Seems the other man, um Andrew, was happy to have a baby but not take on a child from another relationship… so she left me with dad.’

Lucy’s mouth fell open, but she held her breath and waited.

‘I visited sometimes, but they didn’t have a lot of room, so when I stayed overnight, I had to sleep on a little camp bed in the dining room. They got married when Simon, my half-brother, was three. I was eleven. He was a ring bearer, but I wasn’t in the ceremony. It was a weird sort of day—they got married in the town hall then had some drinks in a pub that didn’t allow children, so my gran took me back home to my dad and,’ he looked away, ‘that was it.’

The little boy was dragging his mother from the water, pointing at the ice cream van. She stumbled behind him, laughing, feet splashing through the shallow waters on the shore.

‘I stopped going to visit when I was about twelve. It was too awkward and uncomfortable. I don’t remember my mum protesting that much.’ He took a deep breath. ‘Then we heard that she’d left Andrew for another man, a guy called Ian. Sometime after that, Ian got a job in Scotland, and that was it.’ He swirled his hand in the cool water. ‘She was gone. I heard they got married up there. Third time for them both.’

‘Oh, Jack,’ Lucy said, struggling to keep her voice balanced. ‘I’m so sorry to hear that. I didn’t know.’

‘Don’t really tell anyone,’ Jack said, closing his eyes and tipping his head back. Lucy could see a muscle working in his jaw, and he rubbed roughly at his eyes. ‘Not something I like to think about.’

Lucy felt tears prick her eyes. ‘Do you….’ She wasn’t sure if she could ask questions, but she also felt that if she didn’t ask now, take this chance to know this part of him, she’d miss the opportunity. ‘Did you see her again?’

‘They came down a few times over the years to see family, and she usually got in touch to say she was coming.’ He swallowed. ‘Then one year, when I was about sixteen, she brought a daughter with her, my half-sister Therese, and I felt…’ He blew out forcefully. ‘I thought, who are these people? Who is this woman?’

Lucy could feel the anger and hurt rolling off him.

‘I felt no connection, only disappointment. She wasn’t at all who I wanted her to be. Needed her to be. And I didn’t…’ He swallowed again. ‘Didn’t know she’d had another baby, so...’ He laughed. ‘That was a surprise.’

Lucy choked down a sob. Jack had previously told her he didn’t have any siblings.

‘Soon after that, I was away at university and wasn’t around when they visited. Then I moved to Yorkshire and…that was that. She knows where I am and sends cards sometimes, birthday—usually late—and sometimes a Christmas card, but I’m not bothered.’

Lucy could see he was deeply bothered and in a great deal of pain, but she said nothing.

‘Sooooo…’ Jack ran his hands over his face and, in a falsely jovial tone, said, ‘That’s why I don’t like weddings. All those promises are pointless!’

‘Oh, Jack,’ Lucy said, floating over to him. Then, in a jokey tone, she added, ‘Except this one, of course, which will be happy ever after.’

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