Page 82 of Ask Me Something

Chapter Seventeen

Brian found me ten minutes later still hovering over the trash can.

“God, are you okay?” He obviously didn’t bother to knock or have Nancy buzz me before coming into my office.

I nodded, thankful there wasn’t much more than coffee to come up, and my breathing had almost returned to normal. I had to remind myself to stop clutching my chest. “Fine.” I grabbed a bottle of water from my desk drawer and took shallow sips.

He knelt beside me, looking concerned. “Are you not feeling well?”

“I’m good. Please go,” I managed.

“Not going to happen.” He dialed my assistant. “Nancy, please have a car meet us downstairs in front of the building.”

I wanted to argue, but all of my concentration was centered on getting my heart rate and breathing back to normal and hoping that he wouldn’t suspect my panic attack. I couldn’t even properly tell him to go to hell. The only silver lining was that I’d gotten a handle on things about a minute before he’d come barging in.

By the time Nancy knocked and peeked in to let us know the car had arrived, I was feeling marginally better.

Packing up my things, I walked unsteadily out the door. “Thank you, Nancy.”

She patted my shoulder awkwardly. “Anytime, Sasha. Feel better.”

I was quiet until Brian and I reached the car waiting curbside. Turning toward him, I held up my hand. “I can take it from here.”

“I don’t think so. We can have this discussion on the street in front of the office or back at your place. Your choice, but you’ll hear me out.”

Some choice. I got into the back of the car and stared out my window, refusing to look at him. We were silent the entire ride and until we stepped inside my door.

“Why were you sick?” he queried softly.

Under no circumstance would my pride allow for him to know that his ex-girlfriend had put me into a panic attack. I wouldn’t give either of them that knowledge. “You wanted me to hear you out, so say your piece and then go.”

He hesitated and then walked into my kitchen. Grabbing a glass, he filled it with water and handed it to me. “That stupid bet seven years ago was made shortly after you started. I suppose Juliette told you that ten of the guys in the office bet on who you’d sleep with first. I wanted no part of it, but one evening when we were all out and you’d left early, they started razzing me about it, trying to get me to lay my money down. I bet that you wouldn’t ever sleep with anyone, including me. And I never, ever put money on it. It was, at least in my mind, a way I could get them off my back by showing that I respected you way too much to make a bet like that. You can ask Juliette if you don’t believe me.”

“How did Jamie find out about it?” I needed all of the pieces before I could process it all.

At the mention of her name, Brian’s eyes immediately reflected his anger. “We were chatting months ago, and you came up in the conversation. She was talking about how hard it was being a woman in an office with men commenting on who she’d sleep with instead of her work ethic. I brought your situation up, meaning it as a compliment in saying that these assholes had made a bet when you’d started, and you hadn’t given any of them the time of day. She wondered if I was part of it. I told her my bet was always that you wouldn’t sleep with anyone. Telling her that seemed harmless at the time. Is that why she came by, to bring this shit up out of the blue?”

I sat down on my sofa and rubbed my eyes. Absolute fatigue was seeping into my body now that my panic attack had fully subsided. It had been a roller coaster day, and I was about to crash. “She came with the pretense of wanting to apologize about the nickname comment, moved on to congratulating me for our relationship, and then ended with the finale of asking how much money you’d won on the bet because you’d slept with me.”

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t tell her we were together, but it wasn’t because I didn’t want to. It was because of her connection to Josh. I didn’t think you’d like it.”

“What did you tell her?” I had to ask.

He looked uncomfortable. “That it wasn’t going to happen with us. She’d thought if she apologized for that night at Evan’s that we could move past it. She brought you up, and I told her we were good friends. But I think she’s always known I had a thing for you.”

I wasn’t completely over it, but I didn’t have the energy to stay mad either. “I need a shower, then to go lie down.”

“Tell me what I can do, and please don’t say to leave.”

I inhaled deeply, trying to decide. His face look pained, and he was eager to do something. “Maybe you can order in something for dinner in a couple of hours. I’m feeling better, and I never got around to eating lunch.” I didn’t mention that breakfast had come up earlier.

Moving toward my bedroom, I was thankful that for now, my secret stayed my own. How ironic that on the day I’d been at my best, by the end of it I’d go to my worst.

Later that evening after my short nap, we dined quietly, eating pasta on the couch in my living room by candlelight. My stomach started to recover after getting some food into it. When I couldn’t eat another bite, Brian took my hand and led me into my bedroom.

“Let me blow out the candles and clean up dinner. I’ll be in shortly.”

I nodded and got ready for bed. After climbing in nude between my cool sheets, I closed my eyes briefly. A short time later, I felt him slide in beside me.

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