Page 34 of Ask Me Something

“Probably. He used to tease me about it when I was younger. I’m sure he still knows I’ve got feelings.” She sighed, obviously not liking that fact.

“That’s the first obstacle. You’ve got him up on this pedestal, Kenzie, and I have news for you. If you keep him up there as your crush, he’s not incentivized to get down and be part of the real world. Relationships aren’t easy.” From what little I knew about them. “What could be better for a man’s ego than to have a woman adore him and not have to deal with any obligation?” I started the car and we exited the mall.

She thought about it for a while. “I get your point. Maybe I should sleep with someone else and try to make him jealous?”

Ugh. This was dangerous ground, I realized as I drove onto the highway toward Brian’s house. “Absolutely not. First of all, it won’t make you feel better, and secondly, it won’t get the reaction you’re looking for. However, you should go out on dates and with your friends. Let him see you looking great, feeling good, and not putting him as the center of your attention. Even if you have to go to Starbucks at nine o’clock on a Friday night to sit by yourself, make him think you’re out. And let him know it’s none of his business with whom.” No one knew that I came home from the gym on Fridays and completely crashed on my couch while eating something indulgent. It was all about the image, and who was better at hiding behind it than I was?

“Okay. I can do that. What else? Part of me wants to try kissing him and see if there’s a spark.”

I smiled. “Then you need to figure out a plan to make that happen. However, you most likely will only get one shot, Kenzie. Don’t take it on a whim because you’ve had too much to drink or because you’re anxious. Once you put it out there, it’s staying out there. If you make your move too soon, then it could be years before the timing may be right again, if at all.” I knew that lesson all too well.

“It’s kind of hard to be patient, but I get your point. What happens once I do go for it?”

I shrugged. “He either reacts with; ‘whoa, that’s not how I feel’ or there’s something there.”

“But what if he rejects me?”

This was the tough part. The probability of getting hurt was high if he hadn’t indicated to her over the years that he might feel more. “Then you put on your big girl panties and take it on the chin. But at least then you’ll know for sure, and you can move on. I assume no guy in the meantime can hold a candle to your crush?”

She nodded. “I’m going to get hurt; I can feel it.”

“If you tell your brother what I’m about to say, I’ll kill you.” If I was dishing out advice, I might as well go all the way.

She glanced over, curious, as we pulled into Brian’s driveway. “I won’t say a word. I promise.”

“Okay. You get a big glass of wine, buy yourself a good vibrator, and you say to hell with him. If he can’t realize that you’re a catch, McKenzie, then it’s his loss. You are too pretty, too smart, and way too special for you to allow any man to make you feel like shit.” And there were the words of wisdom from my father when he’d spoken with his teenage girl back in the day. Minus the addition of the vibrator and wine, of course.

She grinned. “I knew you and I would be fast friends.”

* * *

Later that night,Brian and I flirted while watching television downstairs, but because his sister had hung out with us, the opportunity for anything else wasn’t plausible. Our flight was early tomorrow, so we all turned in.

Now I lay in his bed, sexually frustrated. I needed to know what else I was getting into in order to make a decision. Reaching for my phone, I texted him.

“I need to know the rest of the rules. All of them.”

I was surprised when my phone rang in response. “Are you seriously calling me from the basement?”

“You texted me from upstairs, and yes, it’s easier to talk then to type. Plus I don’t trust myself not to touch you if we have this conversation in person.”

“I’m trying hard not to take offense at that statement.” Part of me wanted to go down there naked and see what he’d do.

“It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But I’m in this for long-term gain, not short-term satisfaction.”

“Your bed is sure comfortable,” I teased, enjoying the sound of his groan.

“You’re killing me, Sasha.”

“You’re the one with the rules. Are we doing this? Taking it to this next level?” It was surreal that I was entertaining the idea. Something about falling into bed with him after a few drinks sounded reasonable, but embarking on an arrangement in which there were rules felt a lot more official.

“You tell me? I know that Juliette kind of freaked you out today.” His voice had a soft, sexy tone.

“Yeah, a little. I’m better now, but I’m still on the fence about the rest of the rules.” I wished I could turn off the lingering doubts.

“And what would sway you to jump on over?”

“I need to know all of it.”

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