Page 67 of Without Regret

“Yes. Now. Right now.”

I eased in slowly, rubbing her clit as she started to grind on my cock, taking me deeper inside. I gritted my teeth, trying not to hurt her as she took me to root.

“Fuck me.”

Her plea was about to be my undoing. I pulled out slightly and then thrust home, allowing her to get used to my size. “You’re tight. So good.” I wouldn’t last long with the vice grip she had on me.

“I’m going to come. Oh—”

Everything she said was incoherent. I moved faster now, gripping her hips for leverage as she climaxed a third time, sending me over the edge with her.

I pulled out slowly and then went into the bathroom to wash up. When I came back out, suddenly things seemed awkward. It was almost as though she was trying to treat me like one of her one-night stands.

My hands shoved into my pockets, and I let her speak first.

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, depending on when you get in—unless you have plans for your birthday.”

In other words, don’t include her in them. “Sure. Maybe.”

I watched as she took off her shoes. She seemed to be counting the seconds until I left. In that moment, I realized if I wanted more I had two choices. Tell her and risk losing her altogether. Or keep my mouth shut and enjoy what we had, understanding it was temporary. I chose the risk.

“When is your birthday?”

“Why?” She instantly stiffened at the question.

“Why do I want to know your birthday?” As if I’d just asked her something so private and out of bounds.

She sighed. “It’s in a few months.”

I was pushing despite my understanding it might change things. But considering how off I was feeling about her continuing to keep things casual, perhaps change was the point. “Okay. That was vague. Is it too personal to know your birthday?”

“Sort of. I mean given what this is.”

Wrong thing to say. I’d had enough reminders of that tonight.

“Given this is only sex, and I shouldn’t bother to ask a simple question. Right.” I walked towards her door, pausing when she called my name.

“Trevor. We agreed.”

I crossed to her in two strides, cupping her face. “Yes, well, I no longer agree. Because I’ve figured out it’s not enough for me. We work together. I thought we were becoming friends before the sex. But now that we’re having it, it’s like you’re purposefully trying to put it back into casual. I’m not one of your one-night stands, Emma.”

Her wince made me regret the way that had sounded. But she was deflecting, and I was tired of playing the game.

“I missed you this week,” I said. “Missed the taste, the smell, and even you calling me cowboy. Despite seeing you in the office, it wasn’t enough for me. But you. You either didn’t miss me the same as I did you, or you’re doing a great job of pretending in order to ensure I don’t get any closer.”

“What do you want from me?” Her voice was a whisper of vulnerability.

“More. And if you can’t talk about parts of your past, then tell me. I can respect boundaries. What I can’t abide is pretending I don’t care about you. Because I do. And if you don’t feel the same, then this is it for me. I can’t do it anymore.”

She swallowed hard. “What about work?”

“It won’t affect how I treat you on the job, and I’d hope for the same from you. I respect you too much to let it interfere with our working relationship.”

I dropped my lips to hers for what could be the last kiss I’d ever have with her. Although my body wanted to rebel and tell her we could continue as we’d first agreed, my heart knew I’d only be setting myself up for more hurt in the long run.

“Bye, Emma.”

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