Page 81 of Without Apology

“Yeah, he can’t make it. Stuck at work.”

She gave me a sympathetic look. “I bet he wishes he could be here.”

I wasn’t so convinced.

***

Right before eight o’clock, I left my sister’s place with a tuckered Cooper. Simon had texted, asking if he could come by my house later, but I didn’t think I wanted him to. When I didn’t return his text, he’d called. I’d chosen not to answer. I was hurt, but I didn’t want to blow this out of proportion, so I knew I should probably send him an actual text saying no. Intending to do just that, I pulled into my driveway.

He was sitting on my porch, his car parked in front.

I got out, letting Cooper go first, and watched Simon stand up, dressed in his suit.

“Hi,” he greeted, looking wary.

“Hi.”

“Did you get my text message? Or see that I called? Or did you block my number again?”

I walked up to the door and unlocked it. “No blocking. I should’ve responded saying tonight probably wasn’t a good idea.”

I turned towards him and saw the hesitation on his face.

“Peyton—I’m—It couldn’t be helped,” he finished lamely.

“I’m sure it couldn’t, just like I’m sure you won’t actually ever apologize for it.” Although he’d given me some idea of why he was unable to say the words, I couldn’t tolerate the lack of an apology in this situation. At least my father had always been contrite when he’d disappointed us.

“I—Fuck.” He raked a hand through his hair while I sighed, feeling bad about the snipe.

“I shouldn’t have said that. It’s an old wound and not your fault you’re part of it. It’s fine.” I hadn’t meant for my trigger to become his problem. I needed to be fair. He was here in Dallas for a job. I’d learned he was a workaholic on our very first date. It wasn’t appropriate for me to put on him the expectations I’d apparently built up tonight.

“It’s not fine. And I regret I hurt you. Can I come in. Please?”

It was the look of vulnerability that got to me. I also didn’t think he asked for something with a please very often. So I motioned he could go inside.

Cooper, exhausted from all the attention, went straight to his bed in the living room while I moved to the kitchen to put away my bag of leftovers. “I have burgers or hotdogs if you’re hungry. Potato and pasta salad, too.”

“I’m starving but kind of feel like I don’t deserve it.”

I turned to see him standing by the kitchen stool. This wasn’t the first time I’d fed him when I’d been upset. In the same way, my mother would busy herself in the kitchen to hide her hurt. Like her, I used humor to deflect.

“I’ll only heat it halfway to punish you if you if it’ll make you feel better.”

He tried to hide his grin. “I think it’s fair.”

I took the ketchup and mustard out of the fridge. “Or shall I withhold the condiments?”

“Now you’re being cruel.”

Smirking, I put the two bottles in front of him. We were both going through the motions without addressing the elephant in the room.

He decided to stick a toe in the water. “I hope your niece had a nice birthday party.”

“She did. She’s very into Peppa Pig. Heard of it?” I put a burger into the microwave for him and then dished up a plate.

Taking a seat on the stool, he shook his head. “Can’t say that I have. I’m not up to date on many children’s characters.”

“They’re British pigs, so…”

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