Page 80 of Without Apology

CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT

Peyton

It was a typical family affair at my sister’s house, with my brother-in-law manning the grill and my sister bringing out party trays full of food. Kevin’s parents doted on their grandchildren, who were busy playing in the backyard on their massive swing set/rock climbing/fort thingy. Because this was a birthday party for my now-five-year-old niece, there were pink balloons everywhere. A pig named Peppa cavorted on every plate, napkin, and cup.

At times like this, it was hard not to imagine my parents here, loving the grandparent life. At least my mother would’ve been in her element. I often wondered if my father would’ve slowed down by now, retired. Spent more time with his family.

In my dreams, I hoped so. I also thought a lot about what might have happened if they’d survived that plane crash in Florida. Would he have realized how short life was and spent more time with his two daughters and wife? I knew he’d have been proud of me applying for the CFO position, even if he wouldn’t have understood my hesitation in taking on more responsibility. He’d craved that sort of thing. This was probably why he’d been so successful. But it had come at a price. My mother, hell-bent on spending their wedding anniversary together—there’d been too many such occasions she’d celebrated alone—had accompanied him on a business trip to Miami. They’d died together in a small plane traveling from Miami to Key West. It was my sincere hope the last thing on my father’s mind hadn’t been his career, but the two girls left behind without their parents.

“Hey, you. What time is tall, dark, and British coming by?” Placing a tray of fruit on the table, Jen took the seat across from me.

I glanced at my watch. “About five. So two more hours.”

“Should we hold off on dinner?”

“No, no. He’d hate that.” Besides, there was always the chance he wouldn’t be able to make it. I tried not to go there. Not to take my misgivings about my workaholic father and project them onto Simon. He wasn’t a man who committed to things lightly, so if he said he was going to be here today, I needed to believe it.

“How many times has he stayed over?”

There were a number of less classy ways she could’ve asked, so I should be thankful for the watered-down version. “A few. Could you maybe try to be normal when he gets here?” I might as well have asked a flame not to burn, but here was hoping.

She scoffed. “Please. If he’s into you, clearly he’s not normal, either.”

She wasn’t wrong, especially given how we’d met. “At least don’t give him the third degree.”

“I won’t. Oh, remember we’re picking up Cooper tomorrow to take him on that charity walk with the girls.”

“Yeah, yeah.” I’d almost forgotten since I’d been so distracted lately with work. “When will you cave and get your own dog?”

She rolled her eyes. “Please. You get your auntie fix by coming over to play with the girls, and they get their doggie fix without me having another thing to clean up after. It’s a win-win.”

I chuckled and thought maybe it was.

“I know you said on the phone this was temporary and he’s only in town for work, but is there any chance—?”

I cut her off. “Nope. I’m not even entertaining the idea.” At least, that’s what I kept telling myself.

“Okay. Change of subject. Have you heard about the CFO position?”

I might have preferred to talk about Simon. “No. Not yet.”

“I can’t believe you drove all the way to New York.” She’d known I’d requisitioned a car and driver to take me, but had assumed George was the one who’d coordinated the arrangements. Since I didn’t want to delve into the details, I hadn’t dispelled her of the notion.

“I should hear about the job this week.” If I was being completely honest, I wasn’t sure if I was more nervous about getting the job or not getting it. Part of me I’d never admit to anyone would actually be relieved if I didn’t get the position. Of course, that was contingent on Jeff not getting it, either.

“Good. Do you mind helping Kevin with the burgers? You know how he makes them hockey pucks if someone isn’t watching.”

I was aware of my brother-in-law’s affinity for well-done meat. “Sure thing.” I got up to fetch the cheese from inside and then lend Kevin a hand.

By five o’clock, I started to listen for the doorbell. We’d finished eating burgers and hotdogs out on the patio. I found myself anxious for Simon to arrive. By five thirty, I was looking at my phone every ten minutes. Then by six, it finally came. The text message telling me he wouldn’t be able to make it.

I exhaled a frustrated breath, put the phone back in my pocket, and didn’t bother to reply. I should’ve known better than to get my hopes up.

“Uh-oh, I recognize that look,” Jen sighed.

My smile was strained. I knew she recognized it from having seen it from our mother. Birthday parties, holidays, family gatherings. Of course, back in the day, her look had come after receiving phone calls instead of a text, but the result was the same.

Disappointment.

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