Page 35 of Till Death

Touch it.

The words were not magic; they were the poison of my own mind. They were me. All of this was. Every choice. Every death. Every drop of blood. Me. Me. I wanted this. I craved this. I needed death. The satisfaction. The blade. The blood. The blood.

The blood.

“Stop it.” I dug my fingers into my thick hair, pulling until the pain turned to numbness and the pieces came out in clumps. “This isn’t you.”

“This isn’t you.”

“This isn’t you.”

I couldn’t fight the drag of my eyes back to the brass knob.

It’s cool. Touch it.

“It’ll be cold in my hands. Comforting.”

Yes.

“No.” I backed all the way to the opposite side of the room.

The walls are thin.

“The walls are thin. I could claw my way through. The blood. The death. The kill.”

Yes.

“No. No. No.”

Heart racing, I ran to the door and gripped the cool knob, letting that single sensation comfort every vibrating nerve.

“There.”

Turn it.

“Fight it.”

Arabella Grenwich.

I could picture her in my mind. The single, beautiful slice across her throat. I could hear the curdled gasp. See the moment the life left her eyes and her soul vanished.

I turned the knob slowly, my heart fighting every single inch as the knob gave a little more and a little more, until it passed where a door lock would have kept it.

He hadn’t locked me in. I was free.

The magic became quiet.

Satiated.

Only the haunting remnants of my past echoed around me as I crept into the hallway, pushed my back against the wall, and slid to the floor. The madness had nearly consumed me, and I wasn’t even trapped. I was a victim of my mind. My fear. And had that door been locked, eventually, I would have broken through it. Or clawed my way through the walls. Because no matter how much I tried to fight this power, the second I lost control, it was over.

“Maiden?” that kind, feminine voice from before said. She poked her head around the corner, a smudge of ash on her face, the sun beaming down the hallway, enveloping her hair in a halo of glorious red as she tucked a hammer into a loop on her belt. “Are you okay?”

“The door was unlocked. I didn’t break it.”

She moved tentatively until she was across the narrow space from me, sinking down the wall just as I had, our feet nearly touching. “I know.”

“Was it a mistake? The door being unlocked, I mean.”

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