Page 30 of Out of Office

“Julín...why would you do that?” Shakira asked.

“You were distraught when she left. You told us there is no future. I was trying to spare you.” Julín shrugged, then gave me a contrite look.

“That wasn’t for you to decide,” I told him, wanting to punch something, anything. If this had cost me...

“Just write back to her, explain you didn’t see the email.” Shakira jolted me out of my defeatist thoughts.

“You right, but fuck, what do I say?”

“What were you planning to say before Julín told us about this email?”

I miss you, Gen. Every morning without you is lonelier than the one before.

“I was just going to ask her how things were going.” Both Shakira and Julín gave me a skeptical stare, then Julín offered to get us all more beers. He knew he’d fucked up big-time.

“I know you say he’s not into you, but he acts like he is,” Shakira said the instant Julín walked away.

“No, he doesn’t. It’s not that,” I replied, tired of needing to have this conversation with my loved ones.

“Then what is it?”

“Can we focus on the email?” I redirected her attention, and just as expected, she clapped, ready to brainstorm.

“Yes! Let’s do it.”

She grabbed my phone and popped in Gen’s address.

“You know, you could have written to her social media...”

“Nah, you know I don’t have social media. That’s some stalkerish stuff.”

“So, you didn’t look her up?” Her eyebrow rose, impressed.

“I might have used Chichi’s accounts,” I confessed.

Most of her pictures had been of her and her friend Gino in different happy hours, sometimes outdoors. She was an occasional poster, months with no updates until she had a new picture. I couldn’t see her stories because then she’d have known I was sleuthing, but she was more consistent there. I wonder if it was snippets of her life, or inspirational quotes about achievement. Knowing Gen, the latter.

“So just slightly stalkerish?” She busted out laughing.

“You know what, I’ll email her on my own.”

“Nooo, don’t leave!” she said between giggles.

Shakira negotiated and pleaded as I said goodbye to Fufo, Tito, then found Julín hiding in the kitchen and said bye to him too. Shakira finally accepted I was leaving with a heavy sigh and a hug for encouragement.

Once I got back into my efficiency, I closed the door behind me and plopped on the bed, a spark of hope flickering inside.

I pulled out my phone again and stared at the screen, Gen’s email flashing on the top. What would I accomplish by emailing her? Honestly, all the things I shared with her while still here were present in the back of my mind. My family, Villa Bonita, LasDell Transportation, my people. But the yearning for Genevieve became like an open gap in my heart that didn’t allow me to concentrate.

For once, after two years, I would do something solely for me.

I typed the email and went to bed.

I slept like a rock.

Fifteen

Genevieve

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