Page 105 of The Influencer

He presses my hand over his pec and says, “Please.” He shivers and sighs while I suck his nipples and explore his body with my hands. He lets me turn him over and soothe his sore hole with my tongue for a very, very long time—long enough for him to come on my sheets. Then he lets me suck his spent dick until it’s hard again while he tangles his hands in my hair, thrashes and sobs for me to stop—no—please don’t stop.

And then, after he comes in my mouth, he begs me to come on his chest.

It’s such a fucking relief when I do, too. Would I rather have had his mouth on me or his ass sucking me deep? Even his own fist? Yeah… but I think I fucking ruined him tonight, and spilling on his chest is the cherry on top.

He hugs me to him afterward, still crying softly as he trembles in my arms. It is unbelievably amazing that I’m able to take him to this place—the edge of his own sanity.

“Are you always like this?” I whisper against his wet cheek.

He doesn’t answer me, just digs his nails into my bare back and doesn’t let go. I kiss his neck softly, repeatedly, until he stops shaking and lets out a long sigh. “That was so amazing,” he says.

“Okay. Good. You had me a little worried.”

“No, it was fucking perfect, Ash.”

“You’re sure you’re not upset?” I ask.

“It’s complicated,” he whispers in response.

Complicated, I get. “Let’s get you cleaned up,” I say.

“I can do it.” He squirms away from me and, with a lingering look, gets out of bed. Instead of heading toward the shower in my room, he turns for the bedroom door.

“Are you coming back?” I ask. I mean, I’m fine if Jade wants to sleep in his own bed, but I’m not in love with the idea of him being alone right now. Not if he doesn’t have to be.

“I’ll be back,” he says, and leaves the room.

I flop onto my back and rub my hand mindlessly over my stomach. If I’d known I would complicate things, I would have…

What? Not touched him? Not tried to explore every aspect of his arousal? Not come on his chest when he was begging me to? Right. I wanted to enjoy him—give him orgasms and prove that I meant it when I told him I’d missed him. I wanted it to be fun, though. I had no idea it would make him cry.

Maybe my bigger problem is that I can’t read people for shit. In retrospect, it’s pretty obvious all he really wanted tonight was to be held, but I took full advantage with that kiss that led to everything else.

I get up, rinse off in the shower, brush my teeth, and take my hair down, preparing to sleep—hopefully not alone. I’m worn out from all the late nights in Seattle and traveling in general, but a low buzz of uncertainty keeps my thoughts racing.

Until Jade comes back in. He’s wearing only tight gray briefs, and he hurries to get under the covers. When I meet him there and gather him into my arms, he’s damp, chilled, and covered in goosebumps. I love the way he smells. I love all the expensive shit he uses on his skin and in his hair. He takes such care with himself, sparing no expense, and it shows in the way his skin glows and feels satin smooth.

I push his hair back from his face and plant a quick, firm kiss on his mouth.

“I’m glad you’re home,” he says when I don’t allow the kiss to lead to more.

“Get some rest, Jadey baby. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Thank you.” He snuggles tighter into my chest, securely wrapped in my arms.

I don’t know how he thinks he’s going to sleep like that. How he’ll be able to breathe. I’m perfectly comfortable and definitely more relaxed now that he’s here, but it’s hard to believe he won’t try to roll away in a few minutes.

But he doesn’t. He falls asleep just like that, and once he does, I’m quick to follow.

We haven’t moved when I wake up, the sunshine flooding the room. I’ve got morning wood I’m determined to ignore, but his hand goes right for it. We’re kissing shortly after that, and once again, I’m feeling him up in every sense of the phrase.

“I want you inside me,” he begs.

“My condoms are in my bag.”

“Please… I’ve been so careful.”

I’ve prioritized my health for so long it’s impossible not to now. It’s not that I don’t trust him. I’m sure he’s as careful as he can be. But I have to be, too. “Just kiss me,” I tell him.

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