Page 47 of Desperate Vows

I didn’t know when it happened, but that was all I wanted to do. Hold her, and tell her everything would be okay. That she was mine. All mine, and I would never allow another man to place a finger on her.

Maybe at some point, she would trust me enough to finally talk to me. I didn’t just want to be with her. I wanted to know her.

I wanted to love her.

I wanted her to let me love her.

Chapter Eighteen

CLAIRE

I hated to do it, but Monday morning, I was out of the condo before Lucas woke up. It was tricky. When the man said he was going to hold me, he wasn’t kidding. Even in his sleep, it was like he knew I was trying to escape, and he wasn’t going to let me.

Hearing that voice Saturday night. Turning around to see who it was. I couldn’t believe it. The man who raped me. I’d never had a more paralyzing experience. I short-circuited. I couldn’t move, speak, or think. It was like I was locked inside myself.

I didn’t sleep at all the last two nights. I couldn’t. I kept seeing his face and reliving that moment every time I tried to close my eyes. It was fresh trauma. I’d dealt with the act at the time and as much as I could since then. I was twelve and alone. I couldn’t tell my mom. I couldn’t tell anyone. For a while, I wanted to die. No matter how many baths or showers I took, I couldn’t get clean.

Dirty was just a way of life. Then I found a book about a year and a half later. It wasn’t as good as talking to someone, but it helped me. It helped me realize that it wasn’t my fault. That it didn’t make me dirty. It helped me process what happened as best I could for being so isolated.

Then, slowly, I found my new normal. I wasn’t Claire. I was Claire 2.0.

Before Marco marred the event, the wedding had been so perfect.

As I slid my thumb along the gold band on my finger, I smiled. I never thought I’d like a marriage that I never wanted, but I did. Lucas and I had such a strange relationship. It started off oddly, and it was like I was playing tug of war with my feelings while emotionally dancing with Lucas.

He was kind, then suspicious, tender, then cruel. A weird yo-yo. Half the time, I didn’t even know how I felt about him.

I thought for sure our wedding night would be horrific. That Lucas would decide he’d waited long enough. That we were married, and he would take what he wanted. Only, he didn’t. We talked, we laughed. He held me. He’d been my idea of a husband. Sweet and wonderful and patient.

Since this whole thing started, I had learned a lot. About the world. Myself. What I wanted. Knowing I’d be sneaking away to the lawyer’s office, I’d taken it upon myself to alter my appearance. A ball cap, pulling my hair up into a ponytail, and using socks to give me a of bit a height lift. Not the most comfortable thing in the world, but it was what I could do with what I had.

There was no doubt in my mind that Thea could be watching me. She might like me, but she didn’t trust me either. Honestly, I didn’t think she needed a reason to follow me other than it was fun.

Three Ubers later, I was north of Chicago in Waukegan. Maybe I was crazy, and there was a good chance that Franklin had people here, too, but I figured an agency outside of Chicago was my best bet at finding a lawyer that wasn’t tied to him. I was almost one hundred percent sure I understood exactly what was going on with my trust, but I wanted it verified before I did or said anything.

I finally reached my destination, which was Lofton Bridges' office. Anxiety hit me as I stepped into the office. My hands were shaking so badly.

“Ms. B—Sorry, Mrs. Kalantzis to see Mr. Bridges. I got married yesterday.” I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

The woman returned my smile. “Congratulations.” She snickered. “Took me days to stop giving people my maiden name.”

She escorted me into the office, and Mr. Bridges and I shook hands. “Nice to meet you.”

He waved to the chair across from him. “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Kalantzis. What can I help you with?”

I held out my phone to him with the first picture pulled up. “There are more than a dozen photos on there. Could you explain them to me?”

Eyeing me, he slowly took the phone and began to stare at the screen, swiping from time to time. “First, you have a massive trust fund.” He swiped again. “Your grandparents left it to you, and according to these documents, you would take control of it on your twenty-first birthday or once you were married.”

He looked up. “Based on your ring finger, you’re married, so according to this, you have full access. It’s yours. Your husband is also entitled to half of it now, too, and that’s airtight if you’re wondering.”

“So I already have control of it?” My heart beat faster with each word he spoke. “Does it say how I get access to it?” There was only one reason Franklin would lie about me getting access at twenty-one—to make Lucas think he had to wait. To ambush him.

Mr. Bridges began reading again. “Looks like it’s at Nexus Bank and Trust.”

“How do I…I guess take control of it?”

“There’s documentation that needs to be signed. Disbursement schedules that will need to be set up. That sort of thing.” He finished and handed me the phone. “It tedious, but not difficult.”

---