Page 26 of Dirty Ginger

“I see,” Penelope said. “That is confusing.”

“Exactly,” Amelia agreed with a nod. The mill suddenly stopped, and Amelia sighed once more, pushing the thoughts from her mind. Clara was right – she didn’t have a clear head, and she needed to get that before she saw Beckett again. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. “I really need to get a couple batches of Foxy Diva going. What are your plans for today?”

“I’ll be in the office arranging tours for next weekend now that you’re back.” Penelope opened her arms, and Amelia walked into them as her cousin offered, “Maybe all you and Beckett need is to have a really good talk about what he wants out of this. Maybe he’s just holding back because he doesn’t want to rush you, considering what happened with Luka.” She hesitated, then gave Amelia a sweet smile. “Beckett has been single for a long time. He punched Luka square in the face when he broke your heart. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see why he did that.”

“Maybe,” Amelia said. “Thanks for the talk.” She stepped out of Penelope’s arms. “Love you.”

“Love you back.” Penelope blew her a kiss before heading toward the office.

With Penelope gone, Amelia focused on her work, grabbing the full buckets and headed over to the mash tun, where the crushed malt gets mixed with very hot water, creating enzymes that convert the starches in the malt into sugars and dextrins that eventually becomes the body of the beer. She fell into the rhythm of brewing the beer she loved. Once the mash was complete, the liquid now in the boil kettle to boil for the next ninety minutes, she cleaned the mash tun, putting the spent grain in a large tub that the Blackshaw Cattle Ranch would pick up to use as livestock feed. And by the time the second batch of Foxy Diva passed through the heat exchanger to cool before fermentation, she could finally breathe again, knowing she had the brewery back in order.

She’d spent a few hours coming up with sample ideas, only to realize in the end the ingredients wouldn’t give her anything she hadn’t seen before. Frustrated, and beating her head against the wall to come up with something new and fresh, she finally stepped out a couple hours before dinner, wiping the sweat off her forehead. A quick look next to the brewery and she realized that Penelope had left at some point, but everyone knew not to interrupt Amelia when she was brewing. She quickly took stock of her emotions, and realized she still felt off about Beckett.

Deciding she couldn’t wait any longer to get this resolved, she hopped in her car and drove over to Beckett’s work, knowing if he hadn’t called yet, he was likely training. As soon she drove up the driveway, she spotted him working a gorgeous strawberry roan horse in the sand ring. Not wanting to disturb him, she pulled off to the side of the driveway and got out, taking a seat on the hood of car and watching him.

One thing she had loved about Beckett back in the day was the respect and love he had for horses. Before the tragic accident, he’d had his beloved horse, Smokey, that he’d trained from a colt. That horse would have taken him all the way to the top. Together, they’d climbed up the calf roping rankings so fast, and his grandfather always looked on with pride. But everything changed after the accident. Beckett changed. Gone were his hopes and dreams, and he’d lost all his ambition to continue with the rodeo. And, in turn, he’d lost his way… and her too, giving up on their relationship and ending it without giving her a chance to save it.

And she’d tried to save it. She tried so damn hard. But Amelia had seen her once beautiful life with Beckett vanish, her happiness disappear, and no matter that it ripped her heart out to leave Beckett, she had to continue with her life. Only she couldn’t have imagined this was where she’d end up.

Standing in the center of the ring, Beckett clucked his tongue and hit the rope he held against his leg, sending the horse cantering around the sand ring. He stepped a little closer, lifting up the rope, the horse skidded to a halt, spun, and then after Beckett tapped his leg again, the horse cantered off. Watching his connection to horses felt so familiar, so good.

He clucked his tongue again and the horse moved faster, and Beckett began working the rope over his head. Every move precise. Each circle of his wrist exact. And at the exact right moment, he threw the rope, expertly sliding it over the horse’s head with ease. He pulled the horse tight and called, “Whoa.”

The mare stopped and turned directly to him. Amelia didn’t know much about horses, but Beckett had always told her that when he had the horse’s eye contact and curiosity, he had everything.

For a reason she didn’t quite know, she needed to get closer, just to get a peek of that smile on his face. A smile so familiar, and one she hadn’t seen in so long. When she closed in and caught the full force of it, her breath hitched as everything in her finally settled, like the sand in the ring returning back to the hard ground. Beckett looked at peace, and she felt right at home.

* * *

Some cowboys missedthe beauty of truly connecting with a horse, earning that horse’s trust, and developing a relationship. But Beckett always took the time to make that connection as a teenager, training horses with his grandfather. And he took the time now, reveling in watching Autumn learn to trust him. Earlier today when he roped Autumn, she’d bolted, running in fear. Now she turned to face him, looking to him for guidance. A step in the right direction. He approached and she lowered her head as he stroked her face. “You might have a lot of fire, sweetheart, but you sure as hell got a lot of heart.” She nudged him away and he laughed, slowly taking the rope over her head.

As he turned to give her a much-needed break before he ponied her out for a ride to finish off their day, he caught the most unexpected surprise leaning against the fence. “My day just got better,” he told Amelia, approaching her.

She smiled, and the closer he got, the more he locked into the warmth in Amelia’s eyes, the softness there. She had not looked at him like this in… he couldn’t remember the last time.

“What’s got you smiling?” he asked, settling at the fence between them.

She stepped onto the bottom fence, resting her arms on top. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen you rope. You had the biggest smile on your face. Did you know that?”

He didn’t realize he had been smiling. “No, did I?”

“The biggest I’ve seen on your face in a very long time,” she said, her eyes smiling at him. “You’re so in your element. Do you miss it?”

“I never let myself miss it,” he told her, speaking a truth he’d never say aloud before. “When I decided to walk away from competing, I made peace with that.”

Her eyes narrowed in thought like she was searching for something. She finally asked, “Did you decide to walk away or was that chosen for you?”

He hesitated. “Fair point.” He glanced back to Autumn, who was eating the grass around the ring, realizing it wasn’t exactly a choice. To Amelia, he explained, “The accident changed things. It took away things. Things I couldn’t get back.”

She nibbled her lip, then offered, “Maybe it didn’t take away as much as you think. It sure looks like you still have a love for horsemanship, and clearly you’re still at the top of your game with roping.”

He was at his best, though he didn’t feel the need to confirm it. He’d never stopped training, never stopped roping whenever he got the chance. But he’d given up that dream a long time ago. “I can’t even imagine getting back into the rodeo. The traveling for competitions...”

Her smile brightened. “The traveling is the fun part. Remember all the places we went?”

“Yeah.” It occurred to him then that he’d done his best not to think about those memories too much. “We got to see some great places.”

She glanced at the horse, and Beckett took the time to admire the short jean shorts she wore and the navy-blue tank top that hugged her body in all the right ways. “Do you ever talk to any of your old friends from the rodeo?” she asked, drawing his attention back to her face.

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