Page 4 of Destroying My Ex

I told him things that I hadn’t even shared with my mother. I went as far back in my childhood as I could remember and told him about all the abuse I suffered at Lacey and Janice’s hands.

I wasn’t really looking at him as I spoke, but when I did glance at him once I was through, the look on his face was priceless. I laughed because he looked as if he wanted to murder someone, but for me, it was all in the past and not something I chose to let influence me one way or another.

I have my Mom and both sets of grandparents who, if I’m honest, spoil the hell out of me, so there’s really no time to dwell on people who really don’t matter to me anyway.

My Dad has been trying in the last few years, but as I told him on my sixteenth birthday when he couldn’t be bothered coming to my sweet sixteen because his wife wouldn’t allow him to, it was too little too late, and I didn’t need him anyway.

I don’t see why he even bothers anyway since he was never interested before. From what I gather from my Dad’s aunt, my father was pissed because Mom refused to forgive him or have anything to do with him after the affair.

He was willing to leave the ex and their child if Mom would take him back, but according to him, her pride got in the way, and she never loved him blah, blah, blah, and so that was his reason for remaining salty all these years.

As for Janice, she was pissed because she knew that Mom was my Dad’s one that got away, and if she snapped her fingers right now, he’d come running. Lacey’s just mad that her parents weren’t married when she was born, and she’s the product of an affair, all of which had nothing to do with me, and yet I was the one who bore the brunt of it.

My great aunt doesn’t have a filter so while the others tried to keep me in the dark, she thought it was only right I knew the truth. Plus, she was pissed that I was being mistreated.

Now, at eighteen, almost an adult, I’ve learned to look at things from all angles, and I can’t say that I fault Mom for not taking him back, nor do I fault her for never saying one word to him after the divorce.

My parents didn’t co-parent. I was handed off to my dad by my nanny growing up and she was the one who picked me up as well. Mom was in charge of all my doctor visits as well as anything having to do with school, so there was really never any need for those two to interact, and if there was, one of the grandparents handled it.

No one ever told Mom to let it go or that she was taking things too far when she decided that she would never acknowledge my Dad’s existence again, and because he had allowed Janice to mistreat me from a very young age, I, too had grown to resent him and never wished to have them back together.

Grayson and I talked about all of this, and he asked a lot of questions as if he was genuinely interested so I told him. He was having a hard time understanding how it was that we’d never met, and I told him that was easy.

Lacey would never allow the two of us to be in the same room together, just as she never allowed any of her friends to be around me because she was afraid that I would blow her nice girl cover.

All those weekends I spent at their home, she was usually at his house or away somewhere, which was fine. As for when we were younger, that’s when I was locked in my bedroom as soon as I came home from school, so I wouldn’t have known anything about her life.

I’d heard his name mentioned over the years but never cared much about it, like I said because he wasn’t a friend of mine or someone I knew, so why should I care?

“Was it you?”

“Was it me what?”

“Were you the one who sent the pictures two years ago?”

“How’d you guess?”

“Because none of her friends would’ve done it, and no one else I knew fessed up when asked. I’ve always wondered.”

“Yes, it was me. I thought you should know at least and make your own decision. As I can see, you decided to stay. Now you know a little bit more about that family, and I suppose nothing will change, but that’s your business.”

“What lies did she tell to get you to stay with her anyway?” In my mind, someone who looked like him and was as smart as he was could have anyone he wanted. Why stay with her?

It couldn’t be about money because his family isn’t exactly hurting for cash, and from what I’ve seen, he’s doing pretty well, so maybe he was in love. I guess I can’t imagine anyone loving that train wreck, but I’m biased, so there is that.

“Your father threatened my father’s job if I broke up with her.”

“What?” I knew my Dad was a piece of shit, but this takes the cake even for him.

“You heard me. If I wanted to have an easy college experience, I had to play along.”

His smile made the butterflies in my tummy take flight. It was both sinister and adorable because of the dimples that appeared. “What are you planning?” I don’t know why those words left my lips, but they seemed fitting.

There was a light in his eyes that I don’t think I’ve ever seen in a teenage boy before. He looked years older at that moment as if he’d seen some things. What those things were I have no idea.

“Who says I’m planning anything?”

“I don’t know; you just have this look about you.” Maybe I was wrong after all. We don’t know each other after all, and I could be jumping the gun a bit with my assumptions.

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