Page 34 of Broken

“Mommy. I’m hungry.” She says. Her hair is up in braided space buns. She loves having her hair like mine. She asks me all the time why I have dark hair and she has light hair. I usually just tell her because she’s so much prettier with the lighter colored hair, but her school had a daddy/daughter dance a couple weeks before it ended for the summer and when she didn’t have a daddy to take, she started asking questions.

“Okay baby, do you want to go to the diner and get a burger and fries?” I ask, collecting my back and leather jacket. My friend Bailey came with us, but she's only here to watch McKenna tonight. I'll let her have the day to explore and do her own thing.

“Yesss!” She shouts, grabbing her little bag and matching leather jacket. Her favorite color is pink but not hot pink, it has to be baby pink. Which is only another thing that reminds me of him.

So she wears pink dresses, with her little leather jackets and her bows with her little rocker shoes. She has a whole style of her own and she’s only four. We just celebrated her fourth birthday on May 2nd. She had a full Barbie theme with all her little friends, and it was great. Of course she wanted her Barbie to have a leather jacket.

“Let's go!” She shouts, holding a hand up for me to take. I let her wrap her fingers around mine and we leave, walking down the street to the diner.

When we walk in, I see George and a blonde woman. “Two?” The teenage girl asks, grabbing menus.

“Yes. Can you put us over there?” I ask, pointing in the opposite direction of my brother.

“Of course.” She bends down to look at McKenna. “You look amazing.” She tells her.

McKenna twirls side to side, “Thanks. These are my favorites.” She stomps her foot, lighting up her little black boots.

“Those are the best ever!” The teenage girl says. She stands back up and nods for us to follow her. We take our seats, I put her in the booth across from me, hidden from view if George happens to spot me. My brother still hasn’t met his niece, and I’m not about to let him waltz into our lives now. I’m here for the reunion and that’s all. I want a few things my mother said she saved for me, and then I’m going back home to Moses Lake, where we’re happy. Where our lives are.

“What can I get you guys to drink?” The waitress asks.

“Apple juice, pwease.” McKenna says, using her manners like the good girl I taught her to be.

“I’ll have sweet tea without a lemon, please and thank you.” I remain kind these days. I had an episode where I lost my cool and when McKenna repeated the behavior, I knew right then that I could not let her see me fall apart.

“Of course. Be right back.” She taps two knuckles to the table and then walks away.

“Do you want the kids burger with cheese, ketchup and pickles or the chicken tenders?” I ask, because even though I asked if she wanted a burger and fries in the room, it didn't mean that she suddenly decided that she wanted chicken. It does happen.

“Burger pwease.”

“Please.” I correct her. “You’re leaving the L out of the word sweat pea.”

“Please.” She repeats.

“Thank you. So burger and fries it is.”

The waitress brings out drinks and McKenna crayons and a coloring page. We put our food order in and wait. I watch George, who still hasn't spotted me as McKenna colors on her paper. The door opens and my attention is drawn to the man walking through. My heart stops and my lungs burn when I see him. Westley Sherman, walking through the door.

I freeze, hoping like fuck he doesn’t look this way. Don’t look. Don’t look. I feel like I’m shrinking into the seat. He looks this way and we make eye contact. He offers me a little head nod and then joins George and the blonde woman.

My eyes are glued to the back of his head, and when the blonde woman gets up she hugs him, then he leans down and gives her a quick kiss on the lips.

He’s brought a woman home.

Fuck. We can’t eat here.

Shit. Fuck. Fuck. Shit.

“Double Melt with extra sauce on the side and a burger with fries, only pickles and ketchup. Promise.”

The waitress winks at McKenna and she smiles up at her. “Thank you.”

“Anything else ladies?” I look at our waitress and smile, shaking my head. “Enjoy.”

“Eat up sweet pea.” I tell my daughter, hoping like fuck that we can get out of here without being seen. I don’t want him knowing about her. Not after everything I’ve done on my own. She’s mine. Not his.

“Mommy, can we get ice cream later?” McKenna asks, sticking a fry into her mouth.

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