Page 142 of Not That Into You

I bite my lip. Would it change anything? If Cameron lived in a tiny apartment and had a low-paying job, would I feel more comfortable? “It would at least level the playing field.”

My dad raises his brows as he leans back in his chair.

“We’re from different worlds, Dad. I don’t belong in his world.”

He frowns.

“And he basically acknowledged that.”

“How?”

“He had an important dinner last week, and he took someone else. He took a woman who’s from his social circle.”

My dad’s eyes widen. “He didn’t ask you to go?”

“He did.” I swallow. “But I said no.”

My dad cocks his head. “Why?”

“Because I planned to come home that day.”

“This was last Thursday?”

“Wednesday.”

My dad frowns, and I go back to peeling off my beer label. I know better than to say anything while he’s ordering his thoughts. He’ll only ignore me until he’s worked out what he wants to say.

“Butterbean, I know you haven’t always had an easy time. You’ve been your own person even when others wanted you to be someone else.”

I give my dad a wobbly smile, even though I don’t entirely agree with him.

“I admire that about you.”

Warmth spreads through my chest.

“But sometimes you push people away before they can push you away.” He rests his hand on top of mine. “And I know you’re protecting yourself. I know you don’t want to get hurt.”

I blow out a breath. “Dad...”

“Listen. Your mother and I...” He shakes his head with a smile. “She drew me out. But I had to let her draw me out.” He squeezes my hand. “I had to let her in.”

I shake my head. “It’s not that I’m pushing him away.”

My dad raises his brows.

“It’s not.”

“Then what were all those excuses? His house, the restaurants, the parties? You weren’t able to tell me one thing Cameron wanted that you didn’t.”

I open my mouth but then close it before clearing my throat. “That’s not true.”

He gives me a disappointed look. “Monica.”

“What?”

“Don’t be with him if you don’t want to be with him. But don’t push him away because you’re unwilling to take a chance.”

I look down at the table. Is that what I’m doing? Am I pushing Cameron away because I don’t want to take a chance on us? Could I take a chance on him? I miss him so much it’s sometimes hard to breathe. I miss talking to him.

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