Page 43 of Missing in Action

Holden stared at him. “Is that what you think it is?”

“Don’t you?”

“I don’t know. I’m not an expert. But he seems to have these phases where he drifts away as though he’s gone. And last night, he… whimpered in his sleep, and cried out.”

“I am an expert,” Finn said.

“Yeah, I thought you were,” Holden replied.

“And you? What are your issues?”

“Jesus, Finn, we’re really getting down to it here, aren’t we?”

Finn shrugged. “Consider this like the confessional booth. What happens in Brandon’s kitchen stays in Brandon’s kitchen.”

Holden laughed. He looked into Finn’s dark blue eyes. He liked the guy more than he could say and felt that he could trust him. “I’m a sex addict,” he said.

“Oh,” Finn said. “Whatever I expected, it wasn’t that.”

“Sure.”

“And I don’t really know how to deal with guys when they’re not giving me what I’ve begged them for, if you get me.”

Finn’s eyes were soft. Holden didn’t want to think it was pity. “I’m not sure I do,” he said.

Holden searched for the words. “It drives me to want to be…humiliated. And used. And obviously, it’s hard to be with someone normally when it’s all I’ve ever known.”

Finn kept his gaze on his. “That must have left you with some deep mental scars.”

“I guess.”

“And what about the guy who stole your money?”

Taken aback, Holden said, “Well, he let me control it, and it’s obvious now why. He acted the way I wanted him to act, which was willing to give it to me when I wanted and exactly how I wanted. I know the sex and the relationship was toxic. And I know already that Tyler isn’t like that. And won’t ever be.”

“I’m glad to hear it. Have you talked it over with him?”

“I’ve explained what I am. We haven’t exactly dissected what we did last night.”

“You should. If you want to make a go of it. Seems like you need each other.”

“You don’t think I’m a dirty old man?”

“What?” Finn looked confused.

“I’m twenty-two years older than him.”

Finn shrugged. “And?”

Holden smiled. “I knew there was a reason I liked you.”

Chapter Nineteen

Holden

On the drive home, Holden let his mind drift over every moment of his time with Tyler last night and that day. He let himself feel every kiss, every touch, every slide of Tyler’s hot silky skin against his and every thrust into his body. As his cock grew hard, he told himself he wasn’t going to pull over to jerk off at the side of the road as he had done so very often during his life. Telling himself that made no difference whatsoever.

Even as he swerved over, pulled on the handbrake and fumbled with his belt, he was asking himself what he was doing. You’re minutes from home. Tyler might still be lying naked in your bed. He might be extremely receptive to you crawling between his legs and sucking him off. Wouldn’t you rather get off with his dick in your mouth than at the side of the fucking road in your car, alone?

---