Page 21 of Collision

“Yeah, she’s the only one of us to stick around in our hometown. Even our parents moved to Westlake after Nolan came home from college and decided to live there, too. Luckily, it’s only twenty minutes away, so we’re still able to hang out regularly.”

“She’s still with the vet, right?”

“Yeah, she and Ben and still going strong. All of my siblings except Nolan have partners now.” I’m not sure I could hide the wistful tone in my voice if I tried. There’s no doubt I’m happy for my siblings. They deserve all the happiness they’ve found in their significant others, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous. I’ve always wanted to find that perfect person for me. The one I could rely on to be my sounding board when my head is full of every illogical worry possible.

“Is that something you want?” Sam’s question is hesitant, as if he’s either worried about my answer or how I’ll take the question.

“Having a partner?”

He nods.

“I can’t deny it’s something I’ve envied when I see how happy my siblings are. But I’ve sort of resigned myself to the idea that I’ll likely never find the same thing. There aren’t many gay men in this area, and the few who live here are either taken or assholes.”

Sam hums in agreement. “I know exactly what you’re talking about. And the scene in Greensboro isn’t any better.”

I snort. “It’s almost worse there.” I’ve done my fair share of going out in the city, and let’s just say the guys there are better for a quick night of release and nothing more.

Sam gives me a look of commiseration. It’s the first time I’ve felt someone truly understands the experiences I’ve had. I can share silly stories with my siblings all day long, but no matter how accepting they are, they’ll never get the emotional toll it takes on me to be gay in a small town.

“If you could choose your perfect future without any of the bullshit getting in your way, what would it look like?” Sam asks.

I blow out a breath at the thought. Before I can even think about it, my answer comes spewing from me. “I’d have a man I could count on no matter the situation. Good or bad, I want to know he’d be there by my side through it all. My moonshot goal would include a kid or two and a backyard where we could have my family over for bonfires or something.”

“That. I’ve never been able to put my dream into words, but what you just described is exactly what I’d want.”

Our gazes meet in a heavy moment of silence as the implications of what we’ve confessed cover us like a blanket of hopes and desires we’ve kept close to our chests. Emotions arc between us, and the image of him chasing a little blonde-headed kiddo through our house punches me straight in the solar plexus.

I clear my throat, breaking the intensity and giving myself a chance to take a deep breath. “You ready for dessert?”

“Yeah,” Sam says quietly. “What kind of cookies did you make?”

I get up and gather our plates to help clean up a little. “I call them monster cookies, mostly because they’re ginormous. They’ve got chocolate chips, pretzels, and M&M’s.”

Sam opens the container and groans. “They smell fucking fantastic.”

Huffing out a laugh, I grab a couple of napkins and sit back down next to Sam. We eat our cookies in comfortable silence. Baking isn’t something I’m great at, but I have perfected this recipe. It’s the best combination of salty and sweet.

“These are amazing. Where did you get the recipe?”

A blush creeps into my cheeks. “I… um… created it myself.”

“Shut the fuck up. You did not.” He scoffs.

I grin at him. “I swear I did. I was craving something salty and sweet one night, and all I had was a bag of pretzels and some chocolate chip cookies. It tasted way better than I thought it would, so I started experimenting with combining the two foods.”

“You can cook, too, can’t you?”

I give him a sheepish look while I nod my head. It makes him groan.

“And here I thought making lasagna was fancy. Then I went and ruined it by forgetting to start the timer. How embarrassing.”

Reaching out, I rub his shoulder. “No. It was incredibly thoughtful. The only person who ever cooks for me is my mom. It’s always me cooking for others. Well, really, just Nolan. He likes to randomly show up at my house for dinner.”

“Maybe you can give me some lessons. I’d like to learn some other things to make. Usually, I just grab shit from the freezer or grill.”

“I’d be happy to teach you.”

His soft smile makes me lean in to kiss him. I’ve been trying to keep myself from mauling him since we finished dinner, but I can’t hold back any longer.

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