Page 14 of Strike A Chord

“Surly, huh? Good to know. Maybe stop trying to get into that bartender’s pants and get to know him first. Sound like a plan?”

I had the overwhelming urge to answer with a yes, sir. “Understood.”

“Both our lives are crazy busy,” here it comes, the but that hung in the air through the conversation. “But I’m willing to give this a try if you are.”

“This as in us? As in a dating us?” Why did I ramble?

Reagan’s smile lit up my insides. “Yes. We’ll find a time we’re both free and have our first date.” Date? I was happy sitting at the bar for hours on end watching him. Had I already been dating Reagan? Was one-sided dating even a thing? Him taking charge felt right, one less thing for me to worry about or fuck up. He’d let me know what to do.

“Tell me where and when and I’ll be there. Sober. I promise.” Unlike my old man, I didn’t have to drink and could easily go without. I chose to and while I thought it was necessary last night, today, I fully regretted that decision.

Reagan leaned forward and took my hand in his. “Josh, if you were drunk all the time I’d have reason for concern, but you’re not. You come in and have a drink, two at most, and there’s hours when you have nothing but water. You’re better than you think you are, you just need to learn to cut yourself some slack and give yourself a chance.” All I managed was a nod, at a loss for words. Reagan had faith in me, believed in me. Now I just had to do the same.

Learned behaviors, broken patterns, do what you must do to survive. That was all I knew. I’d hate to think where I’d be if I hadn’t got that break with Maiden. Likely sifting through trash cans, sleeping under overpasses, and doing unspeakable things. Fight or flight mode was in my blood and if I wanted a chance with Reagan, I had to mentally beat that demon down.

One of a million I’d need to tackle.

“Do you have any plans for today?”

“Other than taking a shower at some point, no.”

“How about spending it together. Are you opposed to a day date?” The way his fingers skimmed along my hand, calmly, soothing, I could sit and have him do this for hours.

I shrugged. “Never been on a date, day or night. What did you have in mind?”

“Let’s start with getting your car. You said you wanted to shower, right?”

“Yes, I can’t even stand the smell of myself right now.” How the hell did he?

“I have an idea. Let’s grab your car and head to your place, then I’ll drive to the places I have in mind.” Reagan left the kitchen and returned just as I’d finished washing the dishes I’d used. “All right, let’s roll.”

“You still gonna keep the bar closed on Sundays?” To the best of my knowledge, it had always been that way.

“For now. I like knowing we’re guaranteed at least one day to off. Though with as busy as we’ve been that may prove to be difficult.”

Chapter Six

Reagan

I had no idea where to take Josh, having acted purely on impulse when I asked him out. I got the impression I’d have to take charge for this relationship to work and right now what was best for him was to get out of his own head. From what I’d gathered, Josh never had any boundaries before, not really. He’d survived in fight or flight mode since birth, and it was up to me to show him how beautiful life could be. No child should have to live in fear, no adult should have to carry the wounds that he did. Someday, I’d address the things he mentioned last night. But not today. Today would be spent getting to know each other, and to show Josh the places I loved in Washington. Well, a couple at least. It would take a lifetime to share all this great state had to offer.

And now, I knew exactly where to take him.

“How, how’s this?” Josh stuttered as came out of the bathroom in his apartment in a pair of dark jeans and a simple button-up shirt. Not his normal concert shirt and ratty jeans. He’d put much thought into this and wanted to look his best and make a good impression for our first date. While I appreciated that, it wasn’t necessary.

“Josh,” I crossed the room toward him. His head was down, clearly expecting to be scolded. Gently, I tilted his chin up. “Open your eyes.” Fear, rejection and hurt reflected in them, and while everything in the last twenty-four hours was the spur of the moment, it felt right. “I’m not here for your clothing, I’m here because of you, but you look very handsome.” A slow nod was his only reply, he didn’t grasp the depth of my words. Maybe my lips could do a better job than mere words.

He gasped as our mouths met but didn’t pull away. I wound my arms around his waist and pulled him tighter, deepening our first kiss. The slight blush tinting his cheeks as we parted was adorable. Peeling apart the layers that made up Josh would be an eye-opening experience and I looked forward to it. “Grab your stuff, let’s go.”

Blushes when complimented ?

Follows direction well ?

So far, so good. As soon as we hit I-5, headed toward Mukilteo, he finally spoke. “So, you, um, you live with your mom?”

I side-eyed him, and wondered where this was headed. Only one of two ways and generally the negative one was what I got from past dates. “Yes. Is that a problem.”

“What?” His head spun around so fast I thought it’d snap. “No. Not at all. I think it’s kind of cool. I never knew my mom.”

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