Page 17 of Heart of Gold

“It’s fine. Never better. I need alcohol, like right now.” Her eyes scan every direction but at me, and I fail to catch her gaze. Her hands tuck under her thighs. Is she being followed? Did she have to go into witness protection right after we spent time together? Is her name actually Emily Finch?

“I don’t want anything,” I promise. “Just all these years, I was curious. About you.”

“Oh, okay.” More sarcasm. Holding in everything I want to ask, I fold my arms in front of me. We can ease into the tough stuff later.

She fidgets, and I can’t focus.

The server returns with Emily’s drink and my coffee, steaming billowing from a white ceramic mug. Emily throws the black, tiny straw over her shoulder and takes a glug from the side, draining half of it. She winces as she slams the drink back down.

“I have something to tell you,” Emily finally says.

She rests her laced fingers on the table. She stares at the centerpiece as I lean down too.

“You’re making me nervous.”

She lets a long guffaw. “Just wait. Just you wait.”

After letting out a laugh reserved for deranged serial killers, Emily takes another huge swallow of her drink. Only a thin layer of liquid rests amongst chunky ice cubes.

“You’re drinking that really, really fast. Whatever you have to tell me can’t be that bad.”

“Oh, it is.”

She tucks her hair behind her ears, ears I always thought were adorable since they flare out slightly. God, she’s pretty. She closes her eyes and breathes in and out like she’s in a yoga class.

“So,” she says, her eyes opening but staring at the ceiling. “Remember, when we…you know…did it.”

“Yeah.” My cheeks grow hot, and my cock swells against my zipper. Over the years, I’ve played that night over and over again. It was awkward and weird and…perfect.

“Remember when you weren’t sure what happened to the condom but told me not to worry about it?”

“Yes…” Oh my God.

“Well, surprise,” she says, her eyes flashing open to look at me directly. “I had the baby. She’s nine years old. Her name is Olive.”

6

Max

I am numb. My mouth opens but no sound comes out.

I had the baby.

After all those years of wondering why she never reached out, it’s because she had a baby and didn’t tell me.

I look up, my mouth agape. “Is she mine?”

Emily nods, her hair escaping and falling into her face.

Staring at the tablecloth, I feel my limbs buzz. My breath is irregular as the room grows warm. I pull at my collar since my throat constricts.

“I bet you didn’t expect that,” Emily says with an audible sigh as she picks her glass up again, the ice hitting her teeth.

Fuck no, I wasn’t expect that. Driving home tonight is not happening. I need to stay, I need to understand how the fuck I have a nine-year-old child I didn’t know about.

She told me she was a virgin when we slept together, and I believed her. Even if I saw her with a guy several months later, she wouldn’t lie about this.

The server walks to our table. “Are you ready to order?”

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