Page 20 of Birds of a Feather

‘Gerry was so many things to me,’ she continued, her eyes filling with tears. ‘She fulfilled me intellectually, emotionally and physically. We would spend hours discussing philosophy, politics and feminism …’ she gestured to the article – it went on to give credit to all the other female scientists whose contributions to their fields had been overlooked in favour of men, or stolen outright by them. ‘She was a wonderful confidant and companion. We had so much fun together, and shared such tenderness and intimacy.’

Her voice crackled. ‘It was a confusing time. But it was such a happy one.’

‘I suspected that too.’

‘How did you say we could get in contact with her?’ she asked tentatively.

‘We can message her through a networking platform for scientists,’ I replied. ‘Do you want to see a picture of her?’

She sat forward again, this time with such force that she knocked the table and caused our drinks to wobble. ‘Do you have one?’

‘There’s a photo on her bio page.’

I pulled my phone from my bag and swiped and stabbed until I landed on the photo of Gerry. I turned the screen to face Gran.

She took the phone and gasped. I watched her eyes flit over the screen.

‘Her hair was strawberry blonde when I knew her,’ she said wistfully. ‘And it’s shorter. But she’s still got those beautiful blue eyes. And I see she still doesn’t leave the house without her “touch of lippy”, as she used to say. She’s still so beautiful.’

She startled and thrust the phone back at me. ‘She can’t see me, can she?’

I laughed. ‘No, of course not.’

She exhaled quickly.

‘I need to think about all this,’ she said.

‘Of course,’ I said, slipping my phone into my bag. ‘Do you want me to stay with you for a bit?’

‘No, darling,’ she said, shaking her head decisively. ‘I’m fine. It’s just a lot to … it’s been a long … I’m fine.’

‘Honestly, I can stay if you—’

‘No,’ Gran said. ‘Actually, I had planned to get an early night tonight anyway.’

I suspected she hadn’t thought about what time she would be going to bed before that moment, but I understood her keenness to be alone.

‘Okay,’ I said, rising from the table. ‘But if you need anything, just let me know.’

‘I will, love,’ she replied before adding: ‘I’d rather not tell anyone about any of this, so please don’t—’

‘Gran, I would never,’ I replied assertively. ‘I won’t tell a soul. And I won’t do a thing until you tell me to.’

I walked to her side and wrapped my arm around her shoulders, giving her a side hug.

‘I’m just sorry it was so difficult for you to love who you wanted to back then, Gran,’ I said. ‘I can only imagine how hard it must have been to hide your relationship from everybody.’

‘Thank you, pet,’ she replied, her voice cracking again. ‘Are you okay to let yourself out? I’m just going to pop to the loo.’

‘Sure,’ I replied, releasing her from my grip. ‘I’ll talk to you tomorrow.’

As I reached the front door, I turned back and saw her stop in the hallway to look at the Gouldian finch painting. I watched as she reached up and tenderly touched the birds and then wiped beneath her eyes.

Chapter 13

Elise

After she’d splashed some water on her face, Elise made her way into the spare room, where she probed her hand around the back of the top shelf of the wardrobe, searching for the box she’d hidden there on the day she and John had moved in. Eventually, her fingers made contact with the cool metal, and she shimmied the box towards her.

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