Page 20 of A Sinful Gift

As for herself, she felt certain she wanted to leave, but the thought of it made her taste acid. If this was her last night, she did want one thing from them. To be together, fully and completely. So far, they’d only taken turns being inside her. She wantedmore. She wanted it all. She wanted what Blake had promised her, that she’d take them together.

Hazel dressed for dinner that night with care. She had forgone her jeans and instead wore one of her favorite pieces of lingerie. Chalmers had been given the night off, so it was only the three of them in the house. Therefore, she didn’t mind parading around in lingerie. The black teddy she had put on was see-through, and the thong underwear, while uncomfortable, wouldn’t be on long enough to annoy her.

As she reached the large kitchen, she heard Mason and Blake talking but couldn’t hear the words clearly, just the comforting rumble of their deep voices. The kitchen table was set for three, the way she liked it. They never used the large formal dining room. Candles were lit on the table, and a serving of her favorite dish, chicken parmesan with angel-hair pasta, sat on each of the three plates. Her mouth watered at the sight. Mason must have cooked it for her to make this meal special.

She rubbed her chest, trying to ignore the sting she felt deep inside. She wasn’t going to get emotional, not now. She had to focus on sex and her plan to seduce Blake and Mason into agreeing to the idea she’d come up with. She didn’t want to let go of her own life or get too close emotionally to them, but she was convinced that if she came to them from time to time, on her terms, it could be great for the three of them. She cleared her throat, and both men turned to look her way. Mason’s jaw dropped a little, and he let out a whistle. Blake’s gaze seared her as his blue eyes raked over the lingerie and trailed along her bare limbs.

“Well now...,” he said, his tone sinfully dark.

“Forget the chicken parm.” Mason set his beer down on the counter and started toward her, his hands flexing as though he ached to get his palms on her.

Blake thrust out an arm, halting Mason in place. “Dinner first,” he murmured to his friend. “Our girl needs to eat.”

Mason shot Hazel a look that sent a wildfire of pure lust through her and made her want to forget dinner immediately.

“Fine, but the moment dinner’s over, I’m taking her, Blake. No waiting.” Mason’s tone was hard and gruff, and she shivered in anticipation.

Feeling a swell of triumph, Hazel sat down at the table and pulled her chair forward. She waited for the men to join her. She had a proposal to make to them, and she wanted them to be so desperate for her that they would agree to her terms.

Mason and Blake sat down on either side of the table, leaving her at the head of the table so she could face them.

“Given how well this week has gone, I had an idea... a proposal, if you will.”

“Proposal?” Blake arched a dark brow.

“Yes.” She swallowed hard. “The three of us get along, so I thought we could make this a more frequent arrangement. Perhaps every couple of weeks I could come stay here with you.”

“No,” Blake uttered. His soft words felt like a slap.

“No?” she challenged. “Why not?” She glanced at Mason, who said nothing and looked toward Blake.

“Tonight you choose to stay with us or you choose to go. We aren’t interested in casual relationships, are we, Mason?” Blake cut a look to his friend, who nodded in agreement.

“But I can’t...” Hazel tried to calm her sudden rush of panic. “Blake... you know I need to be alone.”

She couldn’t stay, because if she did, she would fall in love with them, and when she lost them it would destroy her. Why couldn’t Blake understand that?

“I told you six years ago that I couldn’t lose someone I love ever again.” She stood, feeling more than ever like a fool. He’d told her what her choices were. Why had she thought she could offer a third option? Because she’d always tried to negotiate everything in her life, that was why. It was what made her such a good lawyer... or so she’d thought. But now fresh doubts crept in about all aspects of her life. All these years she’d thought she’d won the battles against Blake fairly. But maybe he’d let her win, maybe he’d given her those frequent victories so that their game could continue like this. Had that part of her life been a lie?

“Why don’t you sit and eat, Hazel. Then we can talk about this more,” Mason said and reached for her hand.

She flinched. She couldn’t have Mason touch her. If she did, it would make it hard to think.

“Right, Blake?” Mason asked. “Tell our girl to sit and eat her dinner.”

The black pit of despair and pain grew in her belly. “I’m sorry, but I’m not hungry anymore.” She stepped away from the table, and both men rose instantly to their feet. “I think it’s time I left. I’m going to pack my things and call a cab.” She fled the room, running all the way to Blake’s bedroom, where she tore the stupid lingerie off and dressed quickly in jeans and a cable-knit sweater.

She had everything packed, including her laptop, and was halfway down the stairs when she noticed Mason was blocking her way. He stood at the bottom of the stairs, his arms crossed over his chest. He wore a gray henley with a few top buttons undone, revealing his throat and a bit of his chest. It was as if he knew her weakness. She longed to bury her face against his neck and feel his arms come around her and hold her until she felt safe. But that need? That was the thing that scared her. She couldn’t afford to need anyone.

“Sweetheart,” Mason said soothingly in that voice that could have gentled even the wildest of animals.

“No.” She shook her head at him. “No, I have to leave.”

“Why? It can’t be because you lost your parents. Sweetheart, loss is a part of life. The hurt you feel when you lose someone? That means what you felt was real. Grief is no less than the love lost that created it. What matters is how you grow around your grief.”

She stared at him, knowing her gaze was hard, but she had to protect herself, had to protect her heart. “Let me go, Mason.”

He moved, allowing her to walk past him. Even though letting her go was what she demanded of him, it didn’t hurt any less that he did.

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