Page 31 of Moving Forward

“I spent a lot of time with her when Cain and I were together,” Erin tells me. “She’s like another grandma to me.”

“She always dreamed you’d get back together,” Ellie points out. She glances over at me as if she’s making sure I'm listening. She still wants me to stop seeing Cain.

“I was one of the few people who cared about Cain, even when he was at his worst,” Erin admits. “She just wants Cain to be happy. I don’t blame her for that.”

Before Ellie can disagree, her mom calls for her. She lingers for a minute, the we need to talk look thrown my way again. I’m relieved when she walks away.

Erin lifts a onesie and giggles. “Baby TBA is going to be so cute in this.” She’s been calling the baby TBA—to be announced—because she and Conner can’t settle on a name. “This came from Jessa, didn’t it?”

I check my list and nod.

“She’s such a good sister-in-law,” she says with a smile. She sets it on the pile with the other clothing items. “You’ve met him, haven’t you—Cain?”

Met him? I blush. Wanted him to kiss me? My lips tingle at the thought. “I have,” is all I say.

Erin picks up a bag of socks and stares at it for a beat too long. “I know Ellie doesn’t have anything kind to say about Cain, and Ethan didn’t like him either, but he’s a really good guy—even if he doesn’t believe it. He’s been dealt a really bad hand in life and he’s made some poor decisions because of it.”

“How long did you date?” I ask, hoping she doesn’t hear the hint of jealousy in my voice at the thought of them being together.

“Most of high school. We never really broke up officially, but it was obvious we weren’t together anymore. The things he did . . . they weren’t things you would do if you had a girlfriend.”

I frown, wishing she’d say more. What happened to him? What did he do to Erin? What kind of man was he if the Millers—who like nearly everyone—didn’t like him? “But you didn’t give up on him?”

She shakes her head. “I couldn’t desert him. And it didn’t hurt when he did those things. . . . I didn’t feel that way about him. I loved him, but not the way I love Conner.”

Before the conversation can go any further—or I can spill all my confusing feelings about Cain—Conner and Danny show up to help carry the boxes and bags to the car.

You’re not ready yet.

CHAPTER TWELVE

CAIN

In high school, before and toward the end of my relationship with Erin, I flew through girls just as fast as I’ve heard Ethan did. With all of those girls, I never saw a look of rejection as strong as the one Max gave me when she stood up yesterday and told me to take her back to the Millers’. Not even when I practically pushed those girls in any direction other than mine after I fucked them.

I haven’t had such an intimate, heated moment in years—hell, in my lifetime. It only proved to me she was definitely the one. I’d seen the same heat burning in her eyes, telling me she was feeling the same thing as I was and that I was not crazy. Only at the same time, I could see her inner conflict, like she didn’t understand why she felt that way or if she even wanted to. I went cold the moment I saw her expression flicker from hopeful to broken. She’d left me and gone straight back to thinking about Ethan.

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