Page 72 of Satin Empire

Her eyes go wide in surprise. “What do you mean, like that?”

“You use her against me sometimes. I think one of your favorite phrases is, your gran would’ve hated that.”

“I absolutely do not do that. Really, you’re so sensitive sometimes, Jelly girl.”

“Mom, I’m not being sensitive.” I take a deep breath and stare at her. “And stop calling me that, okay? I’m not a little kid anymore.”

“Oh, come on, Jelly girl, you love that nickname. Remember when?—”

“Mom, I’m serious. Stop calling me that.” She doesn’t understand how every time she says it, she only reminds me of the life we used to have and the woman she used to be before Orsino came and changed everything. I’m not that girl anymore, and she’s not that woman either, and it’s time for both of us to move on.

“We don’t have to argue.” She rubs her hands together and I can tell she’s uncomfortable. I’m tempted to apologize just to make her feel better like I’ve done all my life, but things are changing now, and I don’t have to worry about what she needs anymore. For once, I can make myself a priority.

We lapse into an awkward silence for a few minutes. I know she’s waiting for me to break it, but to hell with that. I’m being a petty host right now, but I’m just tired of placating my mother.

In some ways, I owe her for everything I have here. If she hadn’t pushed me into marrying Carlo, I never would’ve come this far, but she wasn’t doing that for my benefit. Everything about my life has revolved around her needs: we lived with Gran because she was too young to take care of me; then I tagged along while she spent our nights dancing in clubs for extra money; then I was dragged into Orsino’s house, even though I never liked the guy.

I don’t hate my mother. I love her so much it hurts sometimes, because I can look at her and understand the person she’s become. I can see the young woman I remember from back when Gran was alive, just as lost and confused as I felt all the time, and I know how much of a struggle it was when Gran passed, and how hard things are for her now. She’s a good mom to Niccolo, despite everything, and she cares about me.

“I hear you’re going to college,” Mom says, finally breaking the silence.

I tilt my head toward her. “That’s the plan. I got my acceptance letter yesterday.”

“No kidding?”

“Seriously.” I still don’t look at her. I don’t want to see confusion or disappointment in her eyes. I think it’ll break my heart.

“That’s amazing, Alana,” she says softly, and I look over at her because I feel like I didn’t really hear her right. “I always wanted to go to college. I’m really happy you’re doing it.”

“Uh, thanks, Mom. I’m pretty nervous and I don’t really know what I want to major in yet, but Carlo is really supportive.”

“Lucky you,” she murmurs with a wistful smile. “A supportive husband is hard to find in this world.” She reaches out and pats my hand. “I’m proud of you, Alana. I know this has been hard, but I’m happy things seem to be working out.”

“Yeah… thanks, Mom.” I can barely believe she’s saying this stuff. The Mom I remember should be giving me crap about how I’m just wasting my time and I’m better off pumping out kids for my man just to make sure he can’t ever get away.

“Just make sure you get pregnant as soon as possible,” she says casually and I roll my eyes because yep, that’s more like it.

Maddie and Allegra finally come over. Mom’s charming and chatty, and the three of them get some wine as they talk about the kids. Niccolo comes running over and leaps into my lap, hugging me tightly and squeezing really hard.

“Come play,” he says, face flushed and happy, breathless from running around.

“I can’t, sweetie. You have the kids to play with.”

“Please, please, please? They don’t believe that you’re my sister. They all think you’re my mom.”

I laugh because I can’t really blame them. Mom rolls her eyes, but she’s used to that by now.

“You go play. Don’t worry about what the other kids say.”

“Fine.” Niccolo gives Mom a hug too then dashes off.

“He’s a cute kid,” Maddie says and the three of them start talking about motherhood with more than a few knowing looks thrown in my direction.

I take the opportunity to cut out of there and refill my wine glass. The kitchen’s nice and cool, and I’m humming to myself as I get the bottle from the refrigerator. Mom’s fitting in with Maddie and Allegra, and everyone’s getting along great, which makes me extremely happy. I love those girls, and I feel privileged that I get to be their sister, and I want Mom to see how great things are here.

When I turn around, I find Carlo standing in the doorway, looking at me like a hawk staring down a mouse. I jump a little and glare right back. “You scared me.”

“How’s your mother doing?” He walks over and kisses my cheek before pulling me against his chest and hugging me tight.

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