Page 21 of Dive Into Me

Lincoln wants me back?! This was bad because that was the last thing I wanted.

“Just forget this happened,” Jamie said. “Please. We can’t hurt him.”

“But, I?—”

Jamie dashed out of the cabana and took off across the beach as if the hounds of hell were on his heels.

“Jamie, wait…”

He didn’t turn back. I stood there staring after him, reeling from his revelation and his kiss. I pressed my fingers to my lips because I could still taste him…

10

JAMIE

I’m the worst friend in the world.

As I stared into the ocean from my room’s balcony, I rubbed a finger across my lips as if I could somehow erase the feeling of Charlotte’s lips against mine. I wish I could, yet I didn’t really want to. That kiss was everything with all the feelings that I’d never experienced in all my years of kissing.

Clutching the banister, I bent over and let out a long, agonizing groan. I felt like I was shoving the knife deeper into Lincoln’s back by thinking about how much I enjoyed locking lips with Charlotte.

“Why are you groaning? Are you in pain?” Lincoln’s voice boomed behind me.

I nearly jumped out of my skin. Spinning around, I gawked at him as if he caught me red-handed. “No… Jesus, Linc, you scared the shit out of me.”

“Sorry.” He squinted at me. “Why are you so jumpy? You have been this way since we got back from dinner.”

“What…? No… I haven’t…” God, I couldn’t even look him in the eye.

The suspicion in his eyes remained. “I’m getting the feeling that it isn’t just about your upcoming birthday. What else is going on with you?”

My stomach did a sickening flip because I never lied to him—to any of my friends—and I was about to commit the sin now.

“It’s nothing more, I promise.” I shrugged. “I guess my emotions are more intense this year. Maybe it’s because I’m getting older. I don’t know, man…”

He nodded, folded his arms over his chest, and leaned against the door frame. As he peered into the night, he said, “Okay. Knowing you, you probably don’t want to discuss it further.”

I only lifted a shoulder in response because I was too busy wallowing in guilt to think of anything to say.

“So, you spoke to Charlotte…”

Every muscle in my body went taut. “I did.”

“She said you apologized.”

I watched him closely. He hadn’t punched me or tried to shove me off the balcony, so she didn’t tell him what else I did.

“Yes.”

“Thanks.”

“No thanks necessary. I owed it to her.”

The problem was that I did way more than apologize… and now I owed it to Lincoln to stay the hell away from Charlotte. I would. I’d avoid her like my life depended on it.

Long after Lincoln left, I lay in bed, staring at the star-studded sky visible through the glass doors. Was Charlotte in bed too? Did she feel as guilty as I did? Would she walk right into Lincoln's arms when he told her he wanted to get back together? The questions swirled in my mind like an overflowing cauldron. I almost went insane.

My brain then shifted gears in a direction that I wished it didn’t, but I couldn’t help it. I imagined Charlotte lying in bed, staring at the same bejeweled sky, thinking about me as I thought about her. Finally, my eyelids drooped and then closed. My visions were of her. That was the only way I could have her. In my dreams…

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