Page 2 of Sugarplum

“So, do we really have to go this wedding?” Julie queried as they stood in line to pay for their parking ticket.

“You know that Melanie will be upset if we don’t, and I know we’re not close, but it’s a good opportunity to go out, maybe meet a few guys.”

Julie snorted. “What guys? Come on, Mel.”

Melissa pretended to gasp. “Don’t tell me you’ve already forgotten what guys are.” She began to check Julie’s forehead, and frowned after a while. “Hmm. I can see I’m going to have to jog your memory because it has been too long my poor sex depraved friend.”

Julie raised an eyebrow. “Oh ha ha, you’re so funny Mel.”

“No, no wait. I’m not finished,” she continued very seriously. “Remember what guys are, Jules? They’re tall, kind of hairy; sometimes they’re cute, a little dorky, but complete pains in the ass?”

Julie pretended to think. “I don’t know Mel. That sounds vaguely familiar. Are you sure we’ve come across this species before?”

“I certainly think so. I’m pretty sure I’m dating one of them. He kind of stumbles about and makes inappropriate jokes.”

“Is that why you keep him around?” Julie teased.

“Yeah, I guess he’s kind of cute. He also fixes stuff around the house, and sometimes he remembers to say nice things.”

“He’s house broken then.”

Melissa smirked. ?

?Oh, you bet he is. So, is any of this ringing a bell?”

Julie pretended to scratch her head. “Do they fart a lot?”

Melissa snapped her fingers. “Exactly! See? You’re getting it now.”

“Yeah, now that you mention it, I do remember what guys are.”

Melissa chuckled as she ruffled Julie’s hair playfully. Julie scowled and swatted her hand away. “You know I hate it when you do that.”

Melissa gave her a wicked grin. “So? I already knew that. What’s your point? It’s entirely too much fun to do it just because it bugs you, so why should I stop?”

“Because it bugs me, and you’re my best friend, so you should be doing nice things and not mean things?” Julie offered as they weaved in and out of the garage searching for the car.

“Ha! I mean I know I’m your best friend and all, but really Jules, you expect way too much. You want me to be your best friend and be nice to you? That’s just too much to ask of a woman.”

“I don’t know what I was thinking,” Julie said very dryly.

“It’s okay, honey.” Melissa turned around to face her and patted her hand sympathetically. “It’s what I’m here for. Don’t you worry about that pretty little head of yours.”

Julie scowled. “If you were anyone other than my best friend right now, I’d so kick your ass because of that sexist, archaic comment.”

“As it is, you can’t kick my ass because you love me too much, right?”

“No, it’s mostly because you’re my ride home, and I’m too cheap to go take the bus.”

Melissa shot her a look, and Julie burst out laughing as they continued searching for the car in an otherwise empty parking spot. There were 3 floors in total, and they were sure they had parked the car on the 2nd floor. The problem was, they had been wandering around for so long, they could no longer remember if they were parked on the right, or the left. Melissa insisted it was on the left, Julie, of course, insisted that it was on the right. They kept going around in circles till finally they found the car in the middle of the damp, odd smelling parking lot. It turned out that neither of them were right. The car was actually in the middle.

“See? I told you it wasn’t on the right,” Melissa said as she slid into the car and switched on the ignition.

“Yeah, well, it wasn’t on the left either.” Julie slid the seatbelt into place, and she heard the click that let her know she placed it correctly.

“I knew it was in the middle, but it was more on the left than the right anyway. It was the middle left.”

“There’s no such thing, Mel.” Julie sounded half exasperated, half amused as she fiddled with the knob for the radio. She kept switching stations till she finally settled on a jazz station, and she hummed along to Miles Davis.

---