Page 62 of Need

“Don’t you want me anymore?” I whispered.

“Do you still want that?”

“Yes,” I nodded. “I’ll do better. I promise. I’ll...”

He pressed his index finger against my lips, stopping my anxious words. “Thank you,” he said. “I’ve been waiting to see if you’d approach me. I’m very glad you did, even if you spoke to Lily first. She gave you good advice. You need to be able to come to me with these things, Brianna. With everything. Good or bad.”

I nodded, and when he released my face, I lay my head on his shoulder once again.

We sat there for a long time watching a movie on television. I only watched parts of it. I was too lost in my thoughts.

Did this mean that we’d be starting again? I thought it did.

I played with the buttons on the front of his shirt as I tried to think of ways I could make sure what happened the last time didn’t happen again. But as much as I didn’t want to panic or have a flashback, I wasn’t sure I could stop it from happening no matter how much I wanted to.

Talk to him. I just had to remember to talk to him. It wasn’t my panic that got me into trouble the last time, it was my not talking.

I closed my eyes and took slow even breaths, enjoying the feel of his hands as they rubbed gently on my back.

Suddenly, I realized the television wasn’t on anymore. The room was quiet except for our breathing. I looked up at him, wondering if something was wrong.

“Time for bed, Brianna.”

Nodding, I stood reluctantly. I couldn’t believe it was time already. I didn’t want him to let me go yet.

He cupped my face. “Go get your nightclothes and bring them into my bedroom with you. Do not change. You have five minutes, Brianna.” Then he disappeared into his room.

Chapter Fifteen

Brianna

I was nervous. And excited. He had something planned. As quickly as I could, I brushed my teeth, gathered up my nightclothes, and made a dash into the bathroom before going to his room.

When I entered, he was still fully dressed, minus his shoes. My brow wrinkled in confusion. Every other night, he’d been waiting for me in his boxers. He smiled and walked toward me. I pressed my lips together, and I could feel my teeth biting into my lip.

“Relax, Brianna. Trust me.”

I nodded, and tried to take some deep breaths. His right hand came down to tangle with mine as he walked backward, leading me into his bathroom.

This bathroom was so much bigger than mine. I’d been in it once before, but its size still amazed me. There was a large counter with two sinks lining half of one wall. Each sink had tall mirrors topped with bright lights. On the other side of the room was a large bathtub that looked as if it could fit more than one person. It was deep, wide, and very different from the bathtub in my house in Dallas, or even the one at John’s.

I quickly closed my eyes and blocked that out. I didn’t want to think about my father. Instead, I continued to follow him farther into the bathroom. We came to a stop in the back corner beside a large glass door.

He released my hand, took my nightclothes from me, and placed them on a bench I hadn’t noticed to my left. “I want your eyes on me at all times,” he said before he reached for the hem of my shirt and lifted it smoothly over my head.

I tried my best to obey him as he removed each article of my clothing. He didn’t go slow as he had in the past. It was quick and efficient, and soon I was standing naked before him, feeling more exposed and bare than I had in two months.

He brushed his fingers across my cheek and trailed them down the side of my neck following the curve of my breast down to my waist. I closed my eyes automatically at feeling his touch again.

“Eyes open,” he reminded me, and I quickly raised my gaze to look at him.

There was always something so intense about his eyes. The mixture of green and brown was unlike anything I’d ever seen before as he stared back at me.

“Now, I want you to undress me.”

I froze. He wanted me to what?

As if sensing my hesitation, he took my hand and placed it against his chest, right over the buttons of his shirt, the same ones I’d been playing with earlier. I gazed up at him, questions in my eyes that I was too afraid to voice.

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