Page 96 of The Rose in the Shadows

The resistance came all too suddenly. I stumbled backward as I hit it, feeling its fortitude like a stone wall. Someone caught my weight and helped steady me on my feet. It might have been Clay, but I lost myself too completely in the boy’s mind to see the world around me.

For a moment, I thought I would lose myself in there, in the sensations of thoughts and memories flowing easily over my consciousness. Emotions that weren’t mine, anger, determination… fear.

“Breathe, Thea,” Clay whispered in my ear. “Control the magic.”

The familiar advice sent a shiver down my spine. That was what he had told me that day on the terrace when I first summoned my powers. He’d been there for me then and he was here for me now.

I could do this.

Breathe.

The gasp of air I sucked into me tasted of cinnamon and oak. I sank into that scent and focused on the memory I wanted from the boy, envisioning it like a golden orb inside his mind.I imagined that orb floating towards me through the darkness. It struggled as if some unseen force was pulling it back, but I clutched at it tighter. He started to whimper, and then he started to scream. The boy cried out in howls of pain that left my toes curling. Dimly, I noticed my nose had started to bleed. I swiped at it quickly, unwilling to give up.

“That’s enough,” Clay cried. “She’s going to kill him.”

“As long as she gets the answer, I don’t care,” the Dragon growled in response.

They might have spoken more. I couldn’t hear them over the ringing in my ears. I couldn’t focus on anything but the power rushing through me.

I was so close. I could do this. They needed to let me do this.

Arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me away.

“She’s going to kill herself!” Clay insisted, voice filled with panic.

I just needed to pull a bit harder…

The boy and I collapsed simultaneously as the memory crashed through the magical wall. Clay’s arms around my waist were the only thing keeping me standing as we watched the boy’s eyes flash with understanding.

“Camilla.” He panted. “Camilla of House Hypatia compelled me. She compelled us all.”

Chapter Thirty-Two

She was gone. By the time the guards had run from the Council chamber to her rooms, Camilla had already disappeared. In her suites they’d found everything they needed to confirm that she had been casting black magic spells. There were forbidden grimoires, weapons, and what appeared to be several large blood stains. I shivered to think what orwhohad to die for her to compel so many people.

She was more intelligent than anyone had given her credit for. She’d done just enough, delegated just enough, so that she could make it by Truthseeker interrogation without actually having to lie. And I had helped her do it myself. After that first attack I’d insisted Lorelai use her powers to confirm that Camilla was telling the truth. And she had been. After all, she’d only saidshedidn’t place it there. She never denied having orchestrated it. No one had suspected her again after that.

I had given her the perfect alibi.

And now Lorelai’s death was doubly my fault.

The Dragon had wasted no time bringing her grandmother in for interrogation, but Alina swore she didn’t know where Camilla was or what she was planning, and the Truthseekers had confirmed it. Though, I questioned whether we could trust that after all that had happened. The Dragon subjected every Witch in the castle to Truthseeker interrogation, but found no additional leads.

He and Clay both got more irritable each day that went by without finding Camilla, so much so that both had showed their scales on more than one occasion. Clay seemed more and more like the controlling and domineering version of himself that he’d been when we first met. Which also meant that while Camilla was being hunted down, he had commanded me to stay locked away in my rooms once again.

I felt as banished as Hyrax was, sentenced to live alone with nothing but my guilt for company.

Lorelai was dead.

I couldn’t move past her death, or my own culpability in it. I saw her face when I closed my eyes or flashes of red hair when I turned corners too quickly. She was everywhere, and she was nowhere.

She was dead because of me.

Nessira and Geia tried to assure me it wasn’t my fault, but their words were lies. Pretty lies perhaps, but untrue. I couldn’t bear to hear their comforts. Eventually, I sent them away. With no reason to leave my room, I didn’t need their help in dressing, and I certainly didn’t need or want their friendship. I didn’t deserve it.

And so, most days, I sat on the bench by my windowsill overlooking the garden, bouncing between emotions. There were moments when I was so angry I was sure I would shake the castle to shambles around me. There were moments when I succumbed to my grief and cried for hours. There were momentswhen my terror grew so intense I could only lie frozen on the floor and live through the memories of that battle.

After a week of complete solitude, a knock at my door finally sounded. The sudden sound in the silence I had grown accustomed to was jarring and left me jumping uncomfortably. My hair was unkempt, falling loosely in knots down my back, and I wore nothing but an oversized silk tunic and cotton leggings. It was hardly the attire for entertaining guests, but I was past the point of caring. I waved my hand at the door, using my power to yank it open from across the room.

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