Page 29 of The Fallback

‘No, this one is different!’ he said eagerly, pointing at the screen. ‘It’s for scientists!’

Rosie looked back down at the screen. ‘And?’

‘And I thought you might find someone more interesting on this one.’ He waited for her comprehension which was not forthcoming. ‘Rosie, I was listening. I heard you when you told me that you never met anyone interesting on those other dating apps.’

Rosie felt herself flush a little; actually, she barely spent any time on the other dating apps and telling Mitch she couldn’t find anyone who shared her interests had been a useful way of getting him off her back.

‘So I did some research and apparently this one is really good!’ He pointed to the computer screen. ‘One of the researchers on the STEM committee was telling me she’d met her boyfriend on there!’

Rosie said nothing, she walked back towards the hob and started stirring the soup she had been making more aggressively than was strictly necessary. When was Mitch going to learn to back off and take his nose out of her love life? Why was he so interested in the first place?

She took a deep breath. ‘Mitch, please.’ She turned around to face him. ‘I know you mean well but you have to back off, OK? Just concentrate on your own love life and stop worrying about mine.’ She went back to her soup.

‘I don’t know why you don’t want to give it a go?’ Mitch asked in confusion. ‘Why aren’t you interested in meeting someone?’

There was an awkward silence broken only by the sound of the soup bubbling on the hob.

‘Rosie, you can’t spend the rest of your life hung up on some guy you met at university.’

Rosie felt her shoulders hunch defensively. At some point over the years it had become easier to use Connor as an excuse, pretend that she was still hung up on him, still too hurt by his abandonment to date anyone seriously.

‘You know it’s OK to move on, to date again? It’s been a long time Rosie, not every guy is out to hurt you, you know. Some of us are good guys.’

Still Rosie said nothing.

‘Why won’t you ever talk about this, Rosie? I don’t know why you won’t open up?’

He couldn’t keep a note of hurt out of his voice and Rosie knew that she hadn’t been fair. She was so dismissive when they talked about dating, shutting him down when he asked her about her love life and instead laughed at the silly events in his. She knew he was always puzzled by her reaction but she couldn’t confess the reason behind it. Let him still think she was broken-hearted by Connor, it was just easier that way.

‘The soup’s ready,’ she said, shutting down the topic once again with a dose of guilt and the loud clattering of bowls.

NOW

Rosie really didn’t feel like opening LetsGetChemical right now. Maybe save that joyous trip down memory lane for another time she thought, rubbing her forehead with both hands.

She scrolled to Hinge and clicked on the ‘Sign In’ link. Entering her email address, she almost hit the ‘forgotten password’ option before she remembered that this had also been one that Mitch had signed her up to. Hazarding a guess, she tapped in ‘MitchIsMyHero123#’ and then grinned, despite herself, when it opened up her account.

Her profile flashed up in front of her and she winced. There ought to be some kind of algorithm that updated your profile in real time even if you weren’t active on the site. She felt a wave of despair wash over herself at being presented with this younger, perkier version of herself, knowing she would need to update her profile before she started using the site again. She was not going to be one of those people who still used the same profile picture for everything, taken approximately ten years beforehand.

She looked at the date of her last log in, almost twelve months ago. Mitch had been right; she really hadn’t been putting any effort in. It was her last attempt to put her feelings for Mitch to bed, not that anything had come of it. A few disappointing dates before she cancelled her membership and resigned herself to a life of unrequited love. But could she really have aged that much in twelve months? She shifted a little to the left to look in the mirror hung on her wall and stared appraisingly at her reflection. Yep, frown creases on her forehead, possibly temporary, brought about by current events. Rosie massaged her face, pulling the muscles this way and that. Nope, once she’d massaged out the frown lines, she still looked much the same, no grey in her hair yet and other than her forehead, her face remained relatively unlined. Maybe she justfeltolder, then? Premature aging brought about by making stupid bets with Mitch. They ought to carry a health warning.

Rosie looked back down at her screen and scrutinised her profile picture. It showed her head and most of her upper torso, she was turned a little in profile and was looking back towards the camera. The sun caught the top of her head and allowed the natural highlights in her hair to show through. She was smiling, an easy and genuine smile. And shewasgenuinely happy; it had been taken by Mitch, of course, at the end of the summer the year before when they had gone to Italy for a few days together to make the most of the last of the summer sun.

It had been a blissful few days, despite how it had ended. Mitch had found them this beautiful farmstead to stay on just outside Florence. The food had been amazing and the weather kind. They had spent days just sat by the pool on the farm, reading and eating and occasionally jumping into the pool to cool off and to try to work off some of the food before the next meal. They had taken a day trip into Florence just the once, but both preferred the peace and quiet of the Italian countryside.

Rosie remembered the languid ease of that trip, with none of the awkwardness that had recently crept in between her and Mitch. There had been laughter and chat, stupid teasing and companionable silences. And lots and lots of Italian rosé.

THEN

‘Are youactuallyasleep?’

‘Mmm, almost.’ Rosie rubbed her eyes, pulling herself out of the dozing state she had been in moments before.

‘Sorry,’ she turned and smiled at Mitch, ‘I’m a terrible holiday companion.’

Mitch laughed and put his arm around her, kissing the top of her head as he did so.

‘It’s OK, I was starting to nod off, too.’

---