Page 25 of Luca

Deep down, I think he was worried she’d be a target. So he allowed the ever present temptation to drink win. The addiction to alcohol provided a secondary gain. The excuse he needed to leave her. Because if anything ever happened to her, after blaming himself for not protecting our mother and sister, he’d have nothing left to live for.

“So, who was the woman at Luigi’s?”

“She was my nurse. In the ER.” I try to keep this conversation short. I’m too tired for a lecture from him.

“She’s very pretty.”

“Yes.”

“All of those kids… belong to her?”

“Yes.”

“Luca—”

I throw my hand up, not wanting to entertain this conversation. “Spare me the lecture, Matteo. It’s nothing. She happened to come in, and I saw her. I merely wanted to say thank you. She stuck her neck out for me when she didn’t have to. Let me leave the ER with my IV still hanging from my arm so I could pick up Domenico but saved my room there.”

Matteo’s brows rise in surprise.

“Yes. She could’ve lost her job had anyone found out. That’s all it was. Gratitude for someone showing a rare kindness to a Bianchi.”

Matteo rubs his chin with his fingertips, his eyes practically staring a hole right through me. There’s no hiding anything from him or my cousin. But I’m really not in the mood to have this argument.

So what? I find her insanely attractive. Yes, I’d love to fuck her. I fantasize about it daily. Truth is, I wouldn’t mind more with her.Much more.But that’s just not possible.

“It doesn’t matter if she has children or not. I won’t go there.” As my stress builds, I pull open my desk drawer and peruse the flavors to avoid the temptation to dig my cigarettes out of the trash and light up. Do I want cherry, orange, butterscotch? I lift a Dum Dum lollipop and attempt to read the label.Birthday cake. Gross.Cherry it is. Removing the wrapper, I pop it into my mouth and look up to see Matteo staring at me like I have three heads.

“I’m trying to quit smoking,” I say around the hard flavorful treat.

Matteo shakes his head.

Pulling the pop back out of my mouth, I sit up in my chair. “Listen. Antonia and Domenico are my priority. She’s not doingwell. But Luigi has offered to take them in, and I think Maria will be good for them. Giovanni is sending extra security. But I’m not going to put another innocent woman in jeopardy. I wouldn’t do that to this girl and her children.”

“I’d be able to take you more seriously if you weren’t holding that child-sized candy in your hand.” He smirks before standing and heading for the door. “You’re a good man, Luca. The best I know. I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“I know. Or anyone else.”

His eyes meet mine, and I can feel the pain in their depths. He’s loved three women. His mother, his sister, and his wife. His broken soul is a patchwork of scars from the failure in his relationship with all three. I reach up to grab St. Michael out of habit and remember he’s not there. “We’re overdue for the range. We should go to Colonial sometime this week.”

Only Matteo doesn’t know, it’s him that’s overdue. I find a way to fit it into my schedule. If I can’t be sitting on the bank of a river or a sandy beach to clear my head, getting in some practice to keep my skills sharp will definitely do the trick.

“You put down the bottle, and I’m in.”

He gives me a glare. I’ll admit, it was a low blow, but it needs to be said. If he’s going to live the life of a vigilante, he can’t do it if he’s been drinking. Mistakes happen. There will be no justice if he is the one who ends up dead.

To the outside world, we look alike. Matteo’s a few years older, but same height, dark hair, and blue-green eyes. He has similar tattoos, but his build is thinner, given most of his calories come from the inside of a bottle. But there’s no mistaking the sorrow. He wears it like a second skin.

“This life isn’t for the women we’d want to love. I accept that,” I reaffirm.

And with that, he turns and walks away.

CHAPTER TEN

Luca

“George,I have a follow up appointment with the surgeon this afternoon. If it doesn’t take too long, I’ll see you when I get back.” However, I know he’ll likely spend the last hour of his shift having a snack and then leave at the stroke of four. So, it’s not likely he’ll be anywhere near here.

“Got it, Capo.”

---