Page 33 of Joey

“Are you ready?” she asked. She was dressed in similar black attire, though she’d opted for a white shirt instead of the black shirt Joey had chosen.

Joey nodded, tucked his phone into his pocket and locked the door behind them. They descended the stairs and headed for Ani’s car. She had insisted on driving him, and Joey hadn’t argued. He doubted he would’ve got to the church in one piece.

The radio was on low for the journey, and Joey kept his eyes on the passing scenery. Everyone was going about their day as if Joey’s life wasn’t unravelling. That day, everything was ending, and he could feel it. This would make everything real. He couldn’t pretend Elliott was away on holiday when they were burying him instead.

A pressure weighed on his chest, and Joey breathed through it silently, willing it away. He wouldn’t ever be able to find out why Elliott had done it. There was no one alive who could know, except if he believed in psychics, and that twisted Joey up even more. The why. If he could understand that, maybe he could find the peace that he hoped Elliott had found. If that had been his only way out, Joey had to believe he was now at peace. He had to be.

Ani parked the car in the church car park and climbed out, leaving Joey to follow. He stared at his fingers for a moment, bracing himself for the barrage of people he was about to see, and then climbed out of the car.

Cameras flashed as they strode for the doors of the church, where people milled around, waiting for the… Joey exhaled. He waited off to one side with Ani while other people chatted. Some of them Joey knew, others he didn’t, but he didn’t interact with anyone. Not even Elliott’s parents when they arrived, looking distraught. He couldn’t unless he wanted to lose it.

Too soon, the hearse arrived, and Joey stared at the coffin inside, surrounded by flowers. Elliott would’ve hated that because he had never been a flower person. Joey couldn’t keep his eyes from the coffin as the pallbearers pulled it from the hearse and lifted it to their shoulders. As they fell into step, heading for the church, everyone followed. Ani led him to a pew, but Joey couldn’t keep his eyes from the coffin now he’d seen it. Imagining Elliott lying inside.

He didn’t listen to the service. He stood for the hymns but didn’t sing. His entire body was numb, which was better than feeling the pain he had before. Elliott’s parents had asked him to say a few words, but he’d declined, knowing he wouldn’t get through it. He had so much he could say about his best friend, but his throat would close up, and nothing would come out. Of that, he was certain.

As the coffin was carried out again, the attendees followed, spilling out onto the path. The sun shone through the clouds as if Elliott was telling them he was there, but no one seemed to pay mind to the weather. Joey was attuned to it because it had been something of a hobby for Elliott.

Ani led him to the car, ignoring the reporters, and they followed the procession to the cemetery before climbing out and walking towards Elliott’s last resting place. Joey slowed to a stop, staring at the gathering. A knot formed in his stomach, and he was grateful they’d hired security to stop the media from coming onto the grounds.

“I’m going to go to wait by the trees,” he murmured, squinting into the distance.

“Are you sure?” Ani asked. He was grateful she didn’t press.

Joey nodded and wandered towards the bench beneath the weeping willow. He leaned back against the bark and watched the burial in the distance. He could only see the backs of the people, which he was grateful for. He didn’t want his final memory of Elliott to be him being lowered into the ground. He wanted to keep the memory of him looking peaceful in the coffin as if he was asleep. It beat the other image burnt into his mind.

His gaze wandered across the surprisingly pleasant view. He’d visited cemeteries before, but he couldn’t remember them being so peaceful. Creepy, yes, but not peaceful. The calls of the birds, the distant rush of water, and the whisper of the wind blowing through the trees drew some tension from him. The hum of the priest’s unidentifiable words mixed gently with the sounds, soothing him.

His gaze passed over the stone arch entrance and carried on. It flicked back again, and Joey blinked several times before his heart began racing. He stared as the unexpected angel in disguise strode towards him.

“Ethan,” Joey whispered, gasping for air.

Ethan slid his arms around Joey, and Joey collapsed into him, tears streaming down his face.

“It’s okay. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere,” Ethan crooned, stroking Joey’s hair while he cradled him.

Joey hadn’t realised how much he’d needed Ethan until he was there. He grasped hold of Ethan’s arm, burying his face against his chest, and let himself go. He wasn’t sure how long had passed, but he eventually became aware of Ethan’s heartbeat against his ear, and he wiped at his face, sitting upright.

“Sorry about that,” he murmured.

“You don’t need to be sorry. It’s what I’m here for.”

Joey stared into Ethan’s eyes, seeing the sorrow and uncertainty in them. He threaded their fingers together. “What are you doing here?” Ethan had already said why, but Joey needed more.

Ethan sighed and looked away into the distance. Joey was sure he wasn’t going to answer, but Ethan turned back and smiled. “You needed me. It doesn’t matter what happens from here on out, but you needed me, and I’m here.”

Joey’s heart skipped a hopeful beat. “For how long?”

Ethan shrugged. “Until we decide what we want or two weeks, whichever is sooner.” The corner of his mouth curved up, and his eyebrows rose. “I still have to go back to work, but Meredith has given me two weeks off.”

Joey closed his eyes and exhaled. “Thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me for this.” Ethan glanced behind Joey and straightened, though he didn’t let go of Joey’s hand.

Joey glanced over his shoulder to where Ani approached. She studied Ethan and then focused on their joined hands before peering at Joey.

“Everything okay?” she asked.

Joey sniffed and cleared his throat. “Ani, I’d like you to meet Ethan. Ethan, this is my shop manager, Ani. I don’t know where I’d be without her.”

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