Page 39 of Secret Santa

“Should you be drinking that much caffeine? Maybe we should just stay–” My shoulders slumped as I sighed. He fussed too much. “Alright. Fine. You’ll get your coffee.” He handed me the sweater and I reluctantly took it. “But only if you put this on.”

We stared at each other, then I sighed again. “Fine.” He continued staring at me, and I lifted my brows. “I’m not changing in front of you.” He grinned and took a step toward me.

“Why not? It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked already.” My stomach tightened at his words, and I forced myself to calm down.

“But this is different,” I mumbled, and his grin broadened.

“How?” He trailed his fingers down my arm, and a shiver shook my body. “I guess last time, I undressed you. I can do it again now.”

“That’s okay,” I squeaked, and he laughed before pressing a kiss to my cheek.

“I’ll make you a to-go coffee,” he said as he stepped back. I smiled my thanks, and watched him walk backward toward the door, our eyes still locked. “I have another surprise for when we get home.”

I didn’t know how I felt about him referring to this place as home. It was his, but it wasn’t mine. That neglected part of me started to warm every time he said it, every time he looked at me like I was his world. I was getting more attached to him by the second.

“Stop thinking whatever you’re thinking,” he said, and I blinked at him, clearing my mind. “Today is a brain-off day.”

“A brain-off day?” I asked, lifting my brows and he nodded. “I can’t turn my brain off.”

“You can if you let me worry about everything,” he said. “All you have to do is enjoy yourself.” I took a deep breath.

If I wanted things to work with him, I needed to stop fighting how I really felt about him. My problem had always been liking someone more than they could ever like me. I always put more effort in, always tried harder to show them I cared. If I worked harder at it, maybe they would realize they loved me back.

Things were different with Aiden, though.

He was already showing me he cared. I was the one being difficult. Maybe it was because I didn’t know how to navigate it, having someone actually care. It was a good feeling, though, I couldn’t deny it.

After he shut the door, I stared down at the sweater. That’s all it was–a sweater, but it felt heavier, like putting it on meant things were real. I was terrified, especially after yesterday, and taking a risk on someone like him was something I’d never do.

But maybe that’s what I needed to do, take a risk like he asked me. I’d held back because of my own insecurities, but he was right.

He should be the only one I care about, the only one I worry about. I could do that. I knew I could make him the center of my universe, and he’d make me the center of his in return.

With a deep breath, I slipped my shirt off and pulled the sweater on. It was the ugliest thing I’d ever worn, but it made me smile. It made me feel warm. It made me feel seen. Loved. Like I was a part of something, a part of someone. Even if I looked and felt a little ridiculous, it would be worth it for him.

18

DANI

Pine filled the icy air as we walked through the maze of trees. Aiden’s hand was wrapped tightly around mine, a soft smile permanently on his face.

I tugged on my sweater, trying to not look as uncomfortable as I felt. Before we left, I felt confident, but now, I just felt ridiculous. People stared at us. Some of them smiled, but I felt like they were secretly laughing at us–at me. Aiden looked so confident in his; I knew everyone was staring at me.

“What about this one?” Aiden asked as we stopped in front of a giant tree. I tipped my head back, taking it in.

“It’s…big,” I said, and he huffed out a laugh. “But it’s for your place, so whatever you think.” I felt his eyes on me, burning into the side of my head.

“What are you doing for Christmas?” he asked, and I shrugged.

“Probably going to Bridget’s,” I said. He squeezed my hand, forcing my attention to him.

“What if you spent it with me?” His voice was almost…shy, like he was scared I’d deny him.

“How about you come to Bridget’s with me?” The words fell from my mouth before I could stop them. His brows lifted in surprise, but he quickly fixed his face before he nodded.

“She wouldn’t mind?” I chewed on my cheek. She probably wouldn’t. She would have an excuse to tease me–which she would love.

“She won’t mind.” I’d never invited a man over for Christmas before. I’d never invited a man to visit my family before. “Only if you want to.”

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