Page 60 of Useless Love

But Gaia being suspicious is a big problem. I need to think of a way to keep her stringing lover boy along. It is probably best I let her handle him if I don’t want my plan to fall to ruins.

Gaia

Mother’s party tonight is going to be stressful. I can’t get in touch with Arianna, so maybe she won’t come. Or would her not being there only make Carmine suspicious? And is she really trying to kill Carmine?

What should I do?

I don’t want Carmine or his family to die. I just want all of this fighting and war to end. Everyone always seems to have an agenda. Arianna, Father…could Carmine have some agenda too? I don’t want to believe it, but our world is always so full of lies. I don’t know what to believe, but I do know that I’m falling for Carmine. There’s no denying it any longer; that’s why my body always gets so heated around him, and why I always get so close to temptation.

I go to my bedroom and get on my knees to pray. God, please help me. Please help me figure out what to do?

I pray for a long time, hoping some answers will come, but God doesn’t yet show me the path. I’m only left with an empty feeling because I care deeply for Carmine, and if I let Arianna marry him, he might die. But Father will give me to Mariano Satta, and I’m powerless.

Please, God, just…

There’s a soft knock on my door.

I get up from my knees and sit on my bed. “Come in,” I call out.

Arianna saunters in. “I got your twenty messages. Which would you like me to answer first?”“You’re here.”

“Obviously.”

So many emotions run through me at once, I don’t know how to handle them. I finally stand and give her an angry look. “Are you planning to hurt the Gaudino family? Kill Carmine?" Her eyes widen and she tries to look innocent. I need to remember how manipulative she can be. Ignoring her, I continue speaking. "When Father said Victoria was not an option. I stupidly thought you wanted to marry for peace. I thought that you were trying to win Father’s affections and do something right for a change. So I kept playing along. But if you’re really planning to marry Carmine so you can hurt him…I won’t. I’ll tell him the truth so he breaks the arrangement.” Carmine will be so angry at me and probably never want to see me again, but at least he’ll be alive.

I’m expecting my sister to have a big reaction—either threaten me or try to start crying to play with my emotions—but she only walks to the window and looks outside. “You’re right.”

I stare at her. “I…You’re not denying it?”

“No, sister. No more lies,” she says to me calmly.

She looks different this time. Vulnerable and real. Is she…really opening up to me and telling the truth. “So you…You’re trying to kill Carmine.”

“I was. The Gaudinos killed Luca; you know how close I was to him.”

I walk closer to her, still feeling guarded. But she seems so relaxed and genuine, it’s hard for me not to listen.

“I loved Luca,” she continues. “So I wanted to marry Carmine and poison him. Then I’d poison the rest of them too. I don’t care if we’ve killed more of their men; they took Luca so they all deserve to burn.” She faces me. “But…”

“But what?”

She walks to the bed and pats it, encouraging me to sit next to her. When I do, she gives me a quick hug. “I’ve been struggling, sister.”

“Y-You have?” She’s really opening up?

She nods. “No one in this family loves me. So I—”

“I love you. You make me angry when you lie, but I’m your twin.” I take her hand. “I love you.”

Her eyes get misty. “Thank you. But…will you still love me when you learn I’m not a virgin?”

I keep holding her hands, surprised that she told me. At least I know that’s the truth since Father just told me that a few hours ago. “I still love you.”

She smiles, wiping her cheeks. “Thank you. I know pretending to be me has been stressful. I’m sorry I pulled you into this. And, I know I messed up yesterday with Carmine, so I went to see him a little bit ago. That’s why I haven’t been answering your messages. I wanted to fix things so he would still go along with the marriage and I could eventually kill him.”

“Please. Don’t kill him. I know the Gaudinos killed Luca, but Carmine didn’t. He’s a good man.” I hope. Everyone around me lies so much, I’m so conflicted.

Arianna smiles softly. “Let me finish. That was my plan. But as soon as he opened the door, he pulled me in for a kiss.”

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