Page 60 of Crushed By Love

He continues, faster and harder, his mouth opening and closing, jaw popping, those moody eyes still heavy on me. And I stand there, watching him take his pleasure like it pleases me too. I can’t help it. The pressure builds and builds until finally, I can’t hold his gaze any longer. I have to look down, to watch exactly what he’s doing to himself, to see all of him.

He’s so big, so hard, so thick and long. Maybe all men look like this, I’ve only seen Coop’s and his was equally impressive, but I have to swallow my nerves at the sight of Ethan’s cock. A shiver of intimidated anticipation sweeps right down into my panties. Suddenly, all I want is to go in there with him, to take his cock in my hands and finish what he’s started.

But I don’t . . .

I don’t because I should hate him. Because I can’t give him the satisfaction. But mostly, it’s because if I go in there, I’ll end up naked too. And I’m not sure that I’m ready for that. So I wait until he rears his head back, a primal groan releasing as he explodes.

Fuck.

Foolishly, I thought this would gross me out but it’s the opposite. Witnessing Ethan come undone in this way is the most erotic thing I’ve ever seen. It’s also a rude awakening to what I just allowed to happen between us and of how weak I’ve become. I’m throbbing for more, my desire for him unmistakable.

I turn and sprint from the room, but not before catching his low chuckle and my name on his wicked lips once again.

The flight response practically drop-kicks me in the head. I lock myself inside in my room and lean against the door, my body pissed that I’m in here instead of with Ethan. What could he do to me? I can only imagine the pleasures he could offer.

After fanning myself for a long minute, I take my sweet time showering and getting ready. When I finally have the courage to leave the room, it’s only because my stomach is demanding food. And also because I can smell the meal Ethan’s cooking downstairs all the way up here. Leave it to bacon to get me out of my hiding place. The unique savory smell has a way of getting to the best of us.

I slip into the kitchen to find him standing over the stove. I’m waiting for him to tease me or tempt me. Whatever it’s going to be, I’m already embarrassed. I’m not like the girls he’s used to and nothing like the women Cooper paraded around the house all summer. And I don’t mean that they’re somehow bad and I’m somehow good. I mean that they’re cool and sexy, meanwhile I’m inexperienced, introverted, and prefer to keep my love life between my imagination and the books I read.

“How did you sleep?” he asks as if the shower scene never even happened.

I exhale. This is an olive branch and I immediately take it. “Like shit, but that was to be expected. How did you sleep?”

“I slept great.” He turns and begins dishing up scrambled eggs, breakfast potatoes, bacon, shredded cheese, and diced avocado into two bowls. If stomachs could cry, mine would out of happiness. This meal looks amazing and smells even better.

“You slept great?” I snort and roll my eyes. “On the pantry floor in the middle of a hurricane, knowing your home has a hole in the side of it and water’s blowing in?”

“That’s right.” He grins and it’s so genuine and bright, so not the Ethan I know but the one I wanted him to be on that first day back in May. “Because I was with you.”

I nearly melt right then and there.

I want to roll my eyes again, to deflect this moment, but I don’t. I just let him have this, let us have this, taking my bowl and squirting ketchup on top. He splashes a generous amount of salsa on his and we go sit at the kitchen table together.

The awkwardness starts to creep back in. Are we really not going to talk about it? He pleasured himself right in front of me and I watched like some kind of pervert. It reminds me of when I first met Cooper and he called me a voyeur. I didn’t think I was but maybe Cooper’s right about me, at least when it comes to Ethan.

“Did you see anything interesting this morning?” He questions teasingly, but his eyes are hot and I nearly choke. So I guess I’m not off the hook.

“Nope,” I say. “Nothing interesting or impressive.” He barks out a laugh and my tension melts. I point to the window. “Well, except for maybe the damage from that storm. Have you gone out to look at it yet?”

That sobers him right up and he nods. “It’ll be fine.”

It might be, but I’m not sure if I will be, because the fact remains that something changed between us last night and this morning. I can’t take it back, and deep down I know I’d be lying to myself if I said I want to.

Twenty-Four

We case the perimeter again but the house seems to be in good shape except for the glaringly obvious tree that has destroyed the primary bedroom.

“What do you want to do about this?” I ask, a frown taking over my face. “Poor tree.”

He looks at me sidelong. “Poor tree?”

“Yeah, poor tree.” I feel worse for the tree than I do for the owners of this house. This is nothing they can’t fix with money. The cost will be like a drop in the bucket for them. But the tree? The tree is a goner.

“Come on, let’s get this poor tree out of here.” He stalks over to the massive limb and begins to heft it, but it’s not going anywhere.

I can’t help it, I laugh. “You really thought you could just pick that up and move it like some kind of Hercules?”

He drops it in a crash of leaves and turns on me, hands on his hips. “You’re right.”

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