Page 15 of More Than Words

Chapter 7

Brett looked guilty. Don’t ask me how I knew that, I just did.

“I tried calling you,” I said to him in a low voice.

Brett grabbed his phone from his jean pocket. “Sorry, I turned it off.” He didn’t give any explanation.

I stared at him. “Brett, what’s going on?”

“Maybe I should…” Lauren started to back away.

My eyes went straight to hers. “No. What’s going on?”

I looked between them both and no one gave me any answers. Had he brought her here to sleep with her? They were dating, after all. Did that make me the other woman? God I hoped not. I’d never wanted to be the other woman. I felt my heart breaking. Not only did I know our friendship was gone, but that the man I loved was with someone else.

I couldn’t do it.

I couldn’t stay.

“I told—” My breath caught. I tried again, “I told you that I loved you, and now I find out you’re with Lauren? After everything we’ve been through? After what happened?”

Brett didn’t say anything.

I shook my head, I was such an idiot. How could I have believed he wanted me the way I wanted him. I pushed past him and headed for my car.

I was glad I came home early. If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, then I would have believed any lies he told me. That he wasn’t in a relationship with her. My eyes started to blur with built-up tears, and by the time I was inside my car, they raced down my cheeks.

I was such an idiot.

No more. I wasn’t going to give him, or any man, the satisfaction of ruling my life. Never again.

I shoved the key in the ignition and turned. The headlights came on automatically and I stared at the road ahead of me. Turning my head to look at Brett, he and Lauren hadn’t moved. They both stood staring at me.

Accelerating the car, my heart said good-bye to the only man I’ve ever loved.

Five days later

I woke up to see the mess that was my living room. Ice-cream containers littered the floor, crisp packets on the coffee table, wine bottles—courtesy of my Hunter Valley holiday— were all empty. And I felt like shit.

Since leaving Brett and Lauren, I had come home, unpacked my car, then went straight to my freezer and started on the ice-cream. Over the course of five days, more ice-cream was consumed, and I’d eaten every packet of crisps in the house. And all my wine was gone.

Okay, this has gone on long enough.

Getting up from my couch I made my way to the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror. I didn’t recognize the woman staring back at me. My hair was all greasy, my face blotchy. My eyes were blood-shot, and there was residue of both ice-cream and crisps around my mouth. I was pretty sure a pimple just made itself a home on my chin. Gross. All because I was still pining for a man that would never love me. I had to get myself together and work out what to do next.

I peeled the filthy clothes from my body and got in the shower. I scrubbed my body-wash into my skin and nearly took my hair out with the force used to clean my head. To be on the safe side, I exfoliated my face —good-bye pimple — and brushed my teeth twice.

I emerged from the shower and wrapped a towel around my body, another in my hair and made my way to my bedroom. I found some old clothes and put them on. It was time to give my place a good clean.

Two hours later, all rubbish was in the garage bin out the back, the floors had been vacuumed and mopped. And the bathroom was sparkling so brightly you could have eaten off it. I had even stripped and washed the sheets from my bed. I felt like I had been cleansed. I was also starving.

Apparently during my mini-breakdown I had eaten everything in the apartment. The fridge, freezer and pantry were all bare. It seemed like a good time to go the grocery store. My one hated chore.

I looked down at myself, I was pretty sure I had gotten bleach on my black top. Changing out of my cleaning gear, I put on jeans, a fresh top, and my ballet flats. Grabbing my handbag I left.

While I was out, I thought about looking for a new best friend. It was a shame one couldn’t buy a best friend and return it if it was faulty. Somehow that reminded me that I still had a key to ex best friend’s place. Maybe when I finished shopping, I would drop past there and give it back. I wouldn’t be using it any more, and I was sure Brett would want to give it to Miss-Pretty-Bimbo-Who-Was-Not-His-Type Lauren.

Okay. That is what I’ll do.

I got out of my car in the car park and crossed the open area of the mall and headed toward the grocery store. I past a flower shop and the smells coming out of it were so beautiful that I walked in and bought myself a bunch. They perked me right up.

I did my shopping and came home to unpack. It wasn’t until I was putting away the ice-cream that I remembered I was going to go past Brett’s place and give him his key back. Great. I checked the time, two pm, he would still be at work. I could drive over when I had finished unpacking and I wouldn’t have to see him. I could get my locks changed, so if he never gave my keys back, he wouldn’t be able to get in.

I placed the flowers in a vase with some water and the apartment smelt sweet with their aroma. Grabbing my key ring I took Brett’s key off. So I didn’t have to waste time when I got there, I could just put it in his mailbox and take off.

Someone knocked on the door as I was about to leave. I opened it, expecting it to be the postman, but it was Brett.

---