Page 96 of Groupthink

“It wasn’t a real question,” I snapped. “So ask what you really want to ask.”

“Why don’t you worry? Why can’t I worry about anything around you? It’s like… impossible.”

I shrugged. “Chaos is the only constant. You can either run around with the bulls in the ring, or sit in the stands and be entertained by it all. I think I pulled you out of the ring, and you get to watch the show for the first time from up here. It’s kind of entertaining, isn’t it, when you’re watching the shit show from a safe distance.”

“Is that what you think it is? My life is a shit show?”

“Life in general is a shit show. Any semblance of control is an illusion.” I tumbled the pile of peeled Yukon Gold potatoes into a sieve, not bothering to count them. “Do you think your life is a shit show?”

“Oh my God, yes.”

“Why?”

“I kissed my boss, as you know.”

“Not a problem,” I said. A tight ball of annoyance clenched in my gut—why was she so fixated on this? “It hasn’t been a problem for you yet.”

“It will be. You heard him.”

“Yeah, yeah.‘Next week,’”I said in my best ominous voice. “That’s for next week. Why worry about it and ruin any segments of your life adjacent to that? The ball’s in his court, and his balls are in your hands. You have the power here.”

She stopped braiding her hair and looked me in the eye. “How?”

I shrugged. “You’re a woman he’s interested in. Youalwayshave the power.”

“Doesn’t feel like it.”

“Then what does it feel like?”

“Drowning.”

“Oh baby,baby,”I said with a chuckle. “Open your eyes and you’ll find out you can breathe underwater.”

She blinked. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

I finished washing the potatoes and poured them into the simmering pot of water on the stove. Some droplets escaped and landed on the hot surface with threatening hisses. “It means you can burn him. And he knows it.”

She furrowed her brow and a single line appeared between them. “I don’t see how—”

“You’ve got something on him. You don’t even have to know what it is. You know how I know? He put his hands in his pockets when we were all having that little chat in the hallway.”

“That doesn’t mean anything—”

“It means everything. It means he’s got something to hide.”

From my perspective, the orchid on the table behind her curled up and over her head, encapsulating her in its floral question mark shape. “How can you be so sure?”

“Let’s just say I have experience with that kind of thing.”

“What, reading people?”

I felt the darkness swell in me. My words flew away again, scattering from my vision. “Yeah.”

Change the subject, change the subject, change the subject—

A vibration hummed through the air.

Grace dug through her pockets and plucked out her phone. Her eyebrows came together when she saw the caller ID. “Sorry, I’ve got to take this.”

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