Page 78 of Beyond Expectations

I will always be grateful for having the chance to watch my children grow, meet my first grandchild, and be surrounded by family and friends that I love.

Forever in my heart.

I love you.

My fists slammed on the desk as everything began to sink in. My father was never coming back. He’d always been my idol. Since I was a kid, I always looked up to him. I have always wanted to be like him. Now, he was gone—the realization and magnitude of how everything was now upon me. The company, stepping up and becoming the head of the family, all responsibilities now fell upon my shoulders. While simultaneously all hope of breaking free from these expectations, feeling like a prisoner within my own life, having a chance to speak to my father and open up about what I truly wanted to do, the things I wanted to change—the life I wanted to set up for myself. It was all too late now.

I made it over to the drink cabinet in the corner. My legs felt like lead. I poured myself a large drink and finished it off in one gulp. The burn of the liquor didn’t come close to relieving the pain in my heart. Finally, I let my body give in. I fell to the floor, and I was undone—a broken man.

Chapter 22

Rhett

Ileft my mother’s house at around two in the morning, calling Russell to come and pick me up. At first, I asked him to drive me home. Then, the thought of being alone made my stomach turn. Changing my mind, I told him to head to Serena’s house. As we arrived, I sat in the car, unable to move. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure if it was best for me to see her. What should I say? Did I want her to see me like this?

We were pulled up on the sidewalk for almost half an hour before I told him to take me to the office and, ignoring the confused look in his eyes through the rear-view mirror. It was almost as puzzling to me. But it felt like the right place for me to be. As he dropped me off, I sent him on his way, telling him to go home and sleep. If I ended up going anywhere else, I’d call a cab.

He was hesitant to leave.

“I’ll be fine. Just go.”

I didn’t mean to snap. I just wanted to be left alone.

Word must have gotten around quickly, as even the evening security staff gave me a sympathetic look. As I entered my office, the clock read 3:00. I was about to make another drink, but something within said coffee would be better.

Sitting at my desk, I watched the swirls of steam rise from my cup, not believing all that had happened in the last forty-eight hours—yesterday seemed like a blur. Even though we were all aware of my father’s condition, it still came as a shock. I had still been getting my head around the fact that my father was dying. But I thought I still had weeks to deal with things and spend time with him. But it was all too late. He was gone. I would never hear his voice again. He’d never make fun of me after showing me a stupid splash piece article he’d read about me in the gossip column. Never see me get married. He would never get the opportunity to meet my children.

My stomach began to heave, and I just managed to make it to the toilet in time as I threw up.

After washing my face in the sink, I downed a bottle of water from the fridge.

I had to pull myself together. I needed to work. I needed to step up. Do what was expected of me. Make this my priority. Everything else must come second. I owed it to my father’s legacy. How could I turn my back on what my father spent his whole life working on and building up? I knew the only way for me to function right now was to power through with work.

My emotions and energy were too restless. I couldn’t be who Serena needed, who she deserved, who she wanted me to be. I couldn’t show her how much I was struggling.

In order to get through everything, I needed to clear all my thoughts of her aside. There was now a company for me to run. It was what was expected. It was all I’d known. All I was good for.

Hours later, I still hadn’t moved from my desk. It was ten o’clock by the time someone walked through my office door. I was surprised that no one had come in sooner. Then, I was even more shocked when I saw it was Dough, my father’s right-hand man, instead of Charlotte.

“What are you doing here? I didn’t think you would come in today.”

Looking up, I watched as he approached me slowly, tentatively—as though I was a wounded animal. His brows creased, and even I could see the sorrow in his eyes.

“I’m so sorry for your loss.”

My body ran on pure caffeine. I’d had six cups of coffee since I arrived and was in no mood to slow down.

“I’m here because I need to be. Where is everyone else?”

“Everyone else is working, in their office or a meeting. We called Charlotte last night and told her not to come in, as we didn’t think you would be. Would you like me to call her and get her to come in?”

“No, it’s fine. She deserves a day off.” I took a deep breath. “Can you get the guys from finance to come in as soon as possible? I need to clarify a few questions about the overhead expenses, including the accounting fees, advertising, insurance, repairs, supplies, taxes, travel expenditures, and utilities we are covering this month.”

I expected him to listen to my orders and be on his way. But instead, he just stood there, staring. And it was making me angry.

“Is there something I can help you with, Dough?”

The angry tone in my voice registered with him as he once again gave his condolences and then left.

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