Page 108 of Arouse Me

“Excuse me?” Savannah squawked with a look of surprise.

“I don’t mean you, sis,” I exhaled with a suffering sigh. “I’m talking about me.”

Ian blinked as Drake shook his head and let out a snort.

“What?” I challenged sarcastically.

“Mellie, Mellie, Mellie. If you think submission is weak, you’ve never really submitted. I think you’re equating compliance with weakness,” Ian stated in disbelief.

“Well, in a way, it is. I mean, all you really have to do is try to make your Master happy. It’s not hard.”

“Oh, sis. Do you honestly think I’m some kind of damn doormat?” Sanna huffed.

“No,” I cried.

“It takes a hell of a lot of strength to hand over every part of your body, mind, and soul. If you think that’s easy, you’ve never fully submitted before.”

I frowned. Was she right? I hated the fact she had me questioning my own beliefs, but what I hated more was the look of pity in her eyes.

“Dude,” Ian exclaimed as he stared slack-jawed at Joshua. “Are you hearing this? Did you know she felt that way?”

“Not outright,” Joshua smirked. “But I suspected as much.”

Bristling, I clenched my jaw. Ian was mocking me. What an asshole.

“Tell us about the other side,” Drake urged.

With a disgruntled frown, I pondered whether to answer any more questions. I didn’t want to hand Ian any more ammo to scorn me with. As if sensing my reluctance, he cursed under his breath.

“I’m sorry, Mellie. I’m a natural born smart-ass. I honestly wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings or make fun of you. I was just giving Joshua some shit, and my lack of sensitivity toward you backfired in my face. I’m sorry, girl. I really am.” By his remorseful expression, he meant it. “Please, carry on.”

Pursing my lips, I nodded. “There’s another part of me that’s strong and independent. I’ve achieved a lot of success with my business and keep my life on track when I’m in charge. I do what I want, when I want, without having to answer to anyone.”

“But you have submissive longings, right?” Drake asked.

“Yes. But I can’t combine the two sides of me. I won’t sit here weak and defenseless with Walker or Tideway out there ready to strike. That just makes me a victim.”

“So, why are you sitting at Master Stephen’s feet?” he pressed, emphasizing Joshua’s alter ego.

“B-because it feels right. At least for now, just not all the time.” I shook my head, confused by the Dom’s questions and my own frustration at trying to sort out my jumbled emotions.

“But, Mel,” Sanna interjected. “The sub has all the power. Even when you submit, you’re still in control.”

Nick chuckled. “Don’t let all that power go to your head, precious.”

Sanna grinned. “Never, Master.”

“There,” Ian exclaimed as he pointed to Nick and Sanna. “That’s a perfect example, right there.”

“What?” I asked confused.

“Ian,” Joshua interrupted. “Can I have a word with you in the kitchen?”

“Sure.” The other Dom shrugged.

Watching the two men saunter off, anxiety spiked, but in a totally different way. Joshua was brewing something, and it wasn’t another pot of coffee.

“Why such a pensive expression, girl?” Drake asked with a tiny smile.

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