Page 51 of 7 Nights of Sin

I needed to stop it. Or get a handle on it. Or something.

Sliding back to six years ago was a terrible idea. But I had no idea what I was doing, and when Kevin suggested walking back to the beach house together, I took his arm and agreed while my head screamed at me that this wasn't going to help.

"You know," he said as we walked. "I think I needed this."

"The fish or the walk?" I asked.

He snorted. "The vacation, Caro. The time away from it all, you know. Christine's bullshit stressed me out more than I wanted to admit, and it's just nice to be away from everything."

"It is," I agreed in a soft voice. "I think this is the longest I've ever been away from work since I started."

He laughed. "You worked most of the time you were here, Caro."

I shrugged a shoulder because the point still stood. I didn't do vacations or too much time off. Most of the time I was sitting in front of my work laptop when I was at home on the weekends, and there had been more than one occasion when I'd just gone into the office on a Saturday or Sunday because it was easier to concentrate there.

I was married to my job, to the feelings of success and accomplishment it gave me, and it didn't help that there wasn't really anything else in my life that made me feel that way.

But I wasn't getting into that again. I didn't want to spend this last night with Kevin feeling like I was just whining.

I wanted to just...spend the time with him. It was amazing how clear things could be when you were walking on the beach, arm threaded with a handsome man's.

The moon was high in the sky, sparkling over the water, and the warm breeze picked up again, blowing my hair around my face. I looked out at all of it and made a mental note to come back one day. When I could really enjoy it the way it was supposed to be enjoyed.

A calloused hand came up and brushed errant locks of hair out of my face, and I turned my eyes up to Kevin while he tucked my hair behind my ear.

"So much hair," he teased in a soft voice.

"You like it," I murmured back.

He nodded. "I really do. I like everything about you. And I wish..." Kevin trailed off with a soft sigh.

I had some idea of what he wanted to finish that sentence with. He wished I was less difficult. He wished I could talk about my feelings. He wished we had more time together.

I didn't know how to make any of those things happen, really. So instead I just leaned up and kissed up, pressing my mouth to his softly.

He made a soft noise of approval and threaded his fingers into my hair once more, pulling me close. One arm went around me, and he almost cradled me while we kissed there on the beach, like we were the only two people in the world.

When he pulled back, we were both breathing a bit harder, and his eyes were dark. He looked down at me and then away, licking his lips.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Can you...will you do something for me?"

I lifted an eyebrow. "Depends on what it is."

"I don't want to lose you again," he said. "And I know before you say it. It was my fault in the first place that things got messed up. I broke up with you, and I wasn't willing to give it a chance. That was on me. So maybe it's on me to fix it. I just...even if it's just as friends, I don't want you to walk away from this and never talk to me again."

And so there it was, all the things he'd probably wanted to say all week, laid out in front of me. I sighed, dragging fingers through my hair as I put some distance between us. "Kevin," I said. "I don't know. I'm not really sure how being 'just friends' with you would even work, considering how this week has gone."

"Would that be such a bad thing? If there were benefits to the friendship?" He was grinning, but it didn't reach his eyes. The things he was saying...he was serious about them, I could tell that much.

"I've told you before. I'm not going to be one of those girls you're used to. I'm not going to be in pictures with you, and having people speculate what we're up to. I'm not going to be one of your scandals."

His exhale was rough, and his nostrils flared. "None of that is even..." He broke off, sounding frustrated. "Okay, some of it was true, but a lot of it was just...opportunistic photographers."

"Like this latest thing?"

It was a bad sign when he wouldn't look at me. "No. That was different."

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