Page 44 of Free Fall

“What?” Ali asked, stepping up to defend her sons for once.

Delilah pursed her lips. “A lovely man.” She gulped, dipped her head. If it were possible, the tension in the air increased, like wading through thick soup.

Henry and Delilah had a five-year-old and a two-year-old when they were Zelda’s age. They hadn’t been married, were living out of a dingy apartment, and they managed fine. Made this mistake once and then done it again three years later. Raised two girls to be strong young women. The pads of my fingers itched with the urge to touch Zelda, to hold her to me and just observe her new state. Had her belly rounded? Had it even been long enough?

“When’s the baby due?” I asked. No one was paying me much attention. I had my phone out, on the calendar, plotting back weeks ready for the answer, not caring how blatant I was behaving.

Delilah shrugged. “We don’t know yet. The hospital told us she was quite far along, but she had an appointment this afternoon for the specifics.” She looked between Ali and me, her lips pursing at her friend. “You’re really okay with this? With how much life is about to change? For both of them?”

Ali and I were going to tell them we were divorcing today, but she’d clearly decided that it wasn’t the right move after the bombshell dropped. I couldn’t grasp the news, not yet, not really, not until I could see her. It wasn’t just her now, shit. There were two of them to love in secret. Two beings in that one beautiful body. I wouldn’t leave her with it. I’d be there however I could.

Our timeline had been shoved up now. We’d lost years we could have spent sneaking around in our blissful ignorance of what we were fucking up. I just needed to see her. Needed to end this farce of a dinner between four adults whose threads were snapping.

“Uh, well, while we’re confessing shit,” I started, glancing at Alison, who shook her head at me in panic. Henry and Delilah looked at me with open curiosity. We’d both been keeping secrets, after all. “A little spanner in the works for you. Ali and I are getting a divorce.”

I left them in the shit show. Ali burst into tears, Delilah lunged for her with hushed words of comfort, and the pregnancy news and Cole drama pushed aside to deal with the two emotional women. One devastated, the other furious. I saluted Henry as I abandoned him, even though I could tell he wanted to talk. He would catch me when we were alone, and I would bite my tongue like I’d been doing for months, telling lies. Lies were a normality in my life now. Not for much longer if I could get Zelda on board.

I had to find his daughter. And she didn’t answer her phone the multiple times I called it at the table. She needed to explain herself. How long had she known?

I was across town and in her college dorm on the next blink, no idea how I’d even got there. The journey was a blur of questions and hypothesizing, somehow driving on autopilot to get me to her.

She opened the door to her dorm room with her head down, scrolling on a food ordering app. “It isn’t saying you’re here yet—” she said, then glanced up, her voice catching in her throat when she saw me and not the delivery guy with what looked to be a pizza based on the image on her phone. “Luca.”

My gaze narrowed at how breezy she was trying to act — just an innocent smile and blinking eyes. She didn’t move to let me into her room, which I could see from above her head was empty.

“When were you planning on telling me I was going to be a grandfather?” I asked, enjoying the way her expression changed from shock to fear to resignation. She stepped aside with no preamble, holding the door open for me to step through with an obnoxious sigh.

“Who told you?” she asked, striding over the bed and throwing herself on it, splaying out. I looked at her body, it didn’t seem any different.

I huffed. “Your dad announced our impending grandparenthood this evening over dinner. Right before I told him I’m divorcing Alison.”

Zelda peered up from her bed in shock, her mouth a comical ‘O’ shape. “What?”

I stripped my shirt off, kicked my shoes from my feet, and took a step closer to her. She watched me from the top of the pale green sheets, frozen.

“Take everything off,” I demanded.

“My pizza will be here in a minute.”

I unbuckled my belt. “They can leave it outside the door.”

"Luca, no. This is a bad idea," Zelda's voice was soft, but her face stony. "We have to talk, not… not… Please."

I shook my head. "My mind is a mess. We'll talk after."

"Luca…" Her eyes were pleading with me, but I couldn't see fucking straight. Rage overtook me, toward her, toward myself, toward everything that had led to this moment.

I held her gaze as I started stripping off my clothes, unbuttoning my shirt, going for the cuffs next. She watched, her lips pursed.

"Why can't we have a normal discussion about this? Be adults." Tears welled in her eyes and her voice rose, with her hands tense and her voice strained, she shouted, "I'm so fucking addicted to you that I don't even care! Luca, fuck me. Do what you want to me." She slumped. "We'll talk after."

Even though she looked resigned, unhappy, I moved closer, kicking my jeans and underwear from my ankles and stepping out of them, leaving myself completely bare. My cock jutted out, reaching for her. I stroked it and gestured with my head to urge her on. “Let me see all of you, Zelda. I need to.”

She gulped back her emotion and nodded, her gaze dropping from mine. Of course I knew how wrong this was. She was begging me for affection, for a moment's pause to discuss options or just exist together in the mess we'd created with our poor decisions and shitty actions. But I couldn't. If I let her in, I would collapse.

“Strip. Spread your legs.”

She sighed and stood, removing her robe and revealing her naked body beneath. I studied her with fresh eyes. Her nipples might be a fraction darker, her hips rounder, but her stomach didn’t look any different. It wasn’t flat, it never was, but it was only the slightest curve, a natural shape, no sign of my child in her womb. Shit. A small part of me was disappointed I couldn’t see the evidence.

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