Page 42 of Free Fall

"That my dad knocked you up?" he responded with flared nostrils and a look of disgust.

I scoffed and floundered for a second, then, with a quiet breath, replied, "Yeah."

"Lucky fucking guess?" He shrugged. "You two aren't subtle if you know what to look for. I don't think you've stopped fucking since Halloween."

"Cole—" I implored, but couldn't think of what to beg for. His silence? Should I have tried to lie? Blamed some other random for my predicament?

Cole didn’t speak for a moment beyond uncomfortable. Then he stepped closer, his hand moving to rest on my lower stomach. I flinched, but let him touch me, held still as his fingers brushed my skin through my sweater. There was something so unnerving about this man, so like his father, but with enough differences to make him unique in it, scary, unfamiliar.

“This is my baby sibling. I’m going to be a big brother. Why wouldn’t I want to help? A quick phone call confession to Henry was all it took.” Despite his kind words, the coldness in his voice made me shudder. “You’ll both owe me. My asshole father will owe me his fucking life after this. I can play daddy for a little while if it gets me what I want…” He stroked his fingers over my belly button, leaning in closer.

“And what is it you want?” I asked him, curiosity winning.

He only laughed, pressing on my stomach to rise back to his full height. Whatever the hell was going on between him and his father, I had a feeling I was just collateral damage in it.

“Tell me what you want,” I demanded, standing my ground even as he slid from the wall and stood in the middle of the hall, forcing the river of people to bend around him. He was immovable, and behind his eyes was mischief.

“I don’t want anything,” he said when I was about to give up waiting.

“Then why do this?”

He shrugged. “For the hell of it.”

Cole left me in the hall, even more confused than before. Something bad was looming from Cole, a darkness or a secret or a plan he was going to pour over all of us like acid. I just had to hope I was out of the way when it exploded.

I’d gained nothing from catching up to him, no explanation or wash of clarity, nothing to help me move forward.

“I can’t believe you have that tiny alien in there,” Seren said as we stepped out of the OB’s office. I had all the tests, including the sonogram, and it was all feeling more real. Can’t deny it when I could see the little guy bobbing about inside me. The most laughable thing about all of it was my due date, fucking Halloween.

Seren had snorted and almost choked when October 31st came out of Dr. Sterling’s mouth. I glared at her and the doctor looked between us in confusion, but then she made a ghost noise and I cracked up too. Couldn’t be any more surreal if it tried. This baby was already testing me. I'd even started leaking little dribbles of milk from my tits like a lumbering dairy cow.

Seeing the baby made me desperate to tell Luca. To see him and talk to him and burrow under his skin again like he was under mine. We hadn’t spoken since the hospital, and it bothered me. The sudden stop to everything, with no word, no explanation on his part. Did he know I had his baby inside me? That all his words of filling me up had come to fruition? Was he avoiding me because it had gone too far?

And shit, I missed him. His touch, his voice. It wasn’t even the sex that I craved, it was just his aura. Being around him, despite us telling ourselves it meant nothing, made me feel complete. Like a damnsap.

Surely my dad had told him… but he would have sought me out, right? Come charging in with all the growls to claim me? My shoulders slumped at the thought that would never happen. He would keep it hidden, like he had me. We would be his dirty little secret. Despite his roundabout promises of fixing everything, telling me we wouldn’t hide forever, I’d seen nothing to prove his words. And now he was hiding from me.

“Why do you look as if you’re about to cry?” Seren asked, grasping my shoulders and turning me to face her in the street. A mother with a toddler in a stroller had to dodge us, but Seren didn’t care. Even when she called us bitches and tutted. “Talk.”

I shook my head. “It’s just pregnancy hormones, Ser. Don’t worry.”

It was clear she didn’t believe me, frowning until I forced a smile. But she let it go, linking my arm in hers and heading down the street. We’d planned milkshakes post-appointment, and she was never one to pass up a peanut butter chocolate swirl. As the scent of sugar and dairy wafting from the cafe filled my nose and made my stomach growl, my spiral dissipated. I sucked in deep breaths as we reached the front door.

“Avery and I have been talking, you know,” she told me as we pushed into the parlor. The pastel colors, all purple and pinks, lighting up the space. It was whimsical, childish, in a charming way. Sickened me a little bit, but that could have been the pregnancy hormones or the gaudy color scheme, either or would do it.

“About?” I asked, shuffling into the line despite the nausea, debating what to order. It didn’t much matter how I felt right now, in thirty seconds my body will have shifted to something different. I hadn’t realized before, but I was having clear food aversions. Not actual sickness, thank god, but I craved fruit, especially berries. I was a chocolate or cookies ‘n’ cream girl before. But the banana or strawberry…

“We’re going to be there,” Seren said. “For all of it, we’ll be there. We’ll be family to you and the little alien. We’ve got a list of three-bedroom apartments to look at. Avery was sending me links to the nicest preschools last night.” She smiled at the prospect, her eyes glowing with warmth. Avery really was the cutest. So cute, I thought I might vomit.

“That’s…” I stopped dead in my tracks, turning to take in every inch of my best friend. Her pin straight hair tugged up into a bun, her big, blue eyes so clear and open. Her pink smile soft. “Seren, that’s insane.” And it was. They were pushy fuckers. Through all of my refusals, they’d been plotting. “You don’t know how much that means to me.”

“Oh lord, don’t cry,” she laughed. “You aren’t a crier, Zelly!”

I pulled her into me, squeezing. “Well, little alien is taking up all the space where my emotions usually go to rot.” I held at her at arm’s length, studying her. “Are you sure? This is a lot.”

“If you move home, or do it alone, it’s going to hurt so much more when Luca isn’t there with you. This way, you have two.” She thought for a moment. “We’ll be a little family thruple.”

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I ordered my milkshake, to the point where the server was uncomfortable, wincing and frowning at me. Seren sent me to sit by myself and told me to get collected because we had more logistics to discuss. So I did, I pulled out my phone and text Avery, thanking him. Then I got to planning.

---