Page 24 of Silver Lining Love

9

WHITNEY

“You can’t change the past. You can’t control the future. Enjoy the present, it’s a gift.” ~ Gamma Mary

He kissed me!

That’s all I could think as I sat on the couch. I was trying my best to make a dent in the piles of laundry to fold that never seemed to stop multiplying, and tried not to overthink the shift in Wyatt. Benji and Alice were both out for the count, and Wyatt was in the backyard with Moose and Mikey “throwing the ball around.”

As I picked up Alice’s tiny tank top, which, honestly, six months ago, I would have thought was mine and probably would have worn, I put both shoulders together and folded it in half as I wondered what had caused the energy shift between Wyatt and me.

Something had definitely changed. He was different. More...available.

I hadn’t been kissed in months, so obviously, I was rusty, but damn, even just a few seconds of his lips against mine had been scorching hot.

But why now?

Why had he kissed me now?

Maybe he was being nice because of my breakdown.

Did he have some sort of fetish that he got turned on when women cried?

No. That couldn’t be it.

He’d witnessed more than one mini-breakdown since the fateful night of the tragedy. And although we’d shared a barely-there smooch tonight, I’d noticed his behavior change last night. Twice the day before, I’d been sure we were going to lock lips, once in the bathroom and then once right before Benji dropped his bottle.

So what had changed?

Why the shift in energy?

Did he have actual feelings for me?

I couldn’t imagine a man like Wyatt making a move if it was just about sex, especially not with me. We’d always been friendly, since the day he walked out to his truck and for some reason I still couldn’t understand, I’d butchered a Southern accent in a lame attempt at flirting. Somehow, we’d managed to be friends. For years.

But I’d always felt like he had a wall up. I’d tried to scale, tunnel beneath, and crash through that wall like the Kool-Aid man, but I’d never been able to get past it. Both last night and tonight had felt like that wall was down, or at least that there was a window in it that was open.

I sighed as I folded a pair of Mikey’s jeans, and it reminded me that I needed to get him a few new pairs. He’d grown at least an inch in the past month. And Alice needed some new pants as well. I’d never imagined that kids needed completely new wardrobes every few months. They grew like weeds.

I wondered if Wyatt would be down for a trip to the mall this weekend.

A flash entered my mind of us walking hand in hand as we pushed Benji’s stroller and Alice and Mikey ran ahead of us.

No. We weren’t some happy family. He didn’t want that. He didn’t want kids.

I needed to remember that.

I was getting way too carried away.

My penis drought was making me see things that weren’t there, like relationship mirages.

Maybe I just needed to have sex.

No. That wasn’t it.

Contrary to popular belief, at least if the Internet was to be believed, I hadn’t actually had that much sex. I’d only ever slept with guys I was in a committed relationship with. Or at least, IthoughtI was in a committed relationship. Apparently, that classification had been up for interpretation.

I’d had four relationships in my life, three of which turned out to be situation-ships since my partners had been screwing other people when I’d thought we were exclusive. There had been several periods in my life where I’d gone months, even a year, without sex. I didn’t just hook up for hooking up sake. The only way I could enjoy the act was if it was with someone I trusted.

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