Page 45 of Bark Or Bite

“Mama!” yelled Gaspar, jumping from the ATV. The entire grove turned to stare at him. “Mama, where are you?”

“Boy, you best not be yellin’ at your Mama,” said Matthew, frowning at his son.

“Pops, you know that I love and respect you both, but she kept that damn alligator! Sema wants to feed that man to him.”

“Oh, Alvin won’t eat a live man,” said Irene, coming toward them.

“Well, he’s not exactly alive,” said Gaspar, whispering now.

“Well, then, he’d welcome the extra meal. He’s been strugglin’ to find fresh meat lately.”

“Did you call him Alvin? And lately? Mama! How long have you been keeping that alligator around?”

“Gaspar, I swear you’re gonna give yourself a heart attack,” said Irene. “Alvin has been around a long time now. In fact, I found him as a baby. His mama was killed and needed someone to tend him. He’s been here, oh, I don’t know, maybe, what Matthew? Thirty years?”

“About that,” he nodded, kissing his wife. “He’s become one of the family.”

“One of the family,” muttered Gaspar. “He’s an alligator! A killing, meat-eating machine! Now, look. I gave in on the gorilla. She’s docile and doesn’t eat meat. But an alligator is different.”

“He’s as sweet as they come, Gaspar. Drag that body toward the old shack row, and that’s where Alvin will be. He’ll take care of things for us.”

“Good God, I’ve been born into the Cajun mafia,” he said, pushing his hair away from his face. His brothers stood beside him, staring at their mother.

“You gotta admit. She was resourceful using what was around her,” said Miller.

“Shut up! Do not encourage her,” said Gaspar.

“Gaspar, you need to get control of yourself,” said Matthew. “Your mother knows what she’s doin’. Alvin has never hurt a human or animal on this property unless asked to.”

“Asked to? Asked to, Pops? He. Is. An. Alligator.”

“Yep, and a real smart one too. Didn’t any of you ever find it funny that we don’t have any water moccasins, copperheads, or rattlers on the property? No predators at all. You can thank Alvin for that.”

“I think I’m losing my mind,” said Gaspar.

“Honey, why don’t we go back to the cabin,” said Alexandra. “I mean, your parents are making a good point. The alligator hasn’t hurt any of the dogs, never bothered the kids, none of us. Maybe it is – uh, tame.”

“Tame. Do you understand what you’re implying? You’re implying that an alligator can be tamed!” Gaspar stilled, hearing the tell-tale hiss of a gator behind him. He closed his eyes, staring at his mother.

“He’s upset because you’re yellin’ at me. Sema, baby, come over here,” she said to the gorilla standing beside the gator. “Alvin, just go around him.”

The entire grove watched in amazement as the animals moved toward the old woman. Sema patted Irene’s head, kissing it, and took a seat beside her. Alvin, the alligator, slowly made his way toward her as well. Sema signed to Gaspar.

“Yes. I know, Sema. Alligator is hungry.” He shook his head, staring at his fellow senior leaders. “I don’t know. I don’t know what to think.”

“Well, I think we trust your parents,” said Nine. “They’ve never led us down the wrong path.”

Trak moved through the crowd of people, getting closer and closer to Mama Irene and her little friends. As he stood in front of Alvin, he reached down, patting the gator on the head, then fed him the remains of an entire cooked chicken.

“Are you shitting me? You knew about this?” asked Ghost. Trak shrugged.

“He’s friendly. Doesn’t bother me or anyone. Besides, he is getting very hungry. That’s why I gave him the appetizer. Decide now what to do.”

“Fine. Fine, Mama. We’ll bring the body to the shacks. Should we put a leash on Alvin, or will he just smell the body?”

“Don’t get fresh. I’m still your mama. He’ll follow us. Come on, Alvin, let’s go.” Sure enough, the alligator followed Irene, Matthew, and Trak, leaving everyone in complete shock.

“I’m going mad, aren’t I?” asked Gaspar, staring at his friends and family. Nine could only smile at his friend.

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